


In His Eyes

by AnotherLostSoul



Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms, Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: A is mentioned a few times, AU L and Beyond work together, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, And fall in love all over again, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Autism Spectrum, BeyLaw is so underappreciated imo, Beyond Birthday is His Own Warning, Beyond Birthday joins the Task Force, Bottom L, Breaking Up & Making Up, Childhood Friends, Childhood Memories, Complicated Relationships, Emotional Constipation, Falling In Love, Full of authors HC for Mr BB, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Love me some BB, M/M, Manipulative Relationship, Marriage Proposal, Memories, Not Beta Read, One sided Light/L, One sided LightxL, Past B/L, Past Underage Sex, Post-Yotsuba Arc, Rem is so done, Suicide, Supportive Beyond, Supportive Watari, Time Skips, Top Beyond Birthday, Wammy House, Wammy's Era, Work In Progress, learning about oneself, over use of pet names, secrets and lies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-15
Updated: 2020-03-12
Packaged: 2021-02-27 09:20:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 24,888
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22264750
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnotherLostSoul/pseuds/AnotherLostSoul
Summary: When L realizes he's close to losing the Kira case he decides to swallow his pride and reach out to an old... Friend?Beyond Birthday joins the Task Force with one sole ambition: Defeat Kira and make L love him again.
Relationships: Beyond Birthday/L, L/Yagami Light, Matt | Mail Jeevas/Mello | Mihael Keehl
Comments: 61
Kudos: 206





	1. Questions

**Author's Note:**

> Man, I've missed me some Beyond! The guy is far too under appreciated in my opinion and I've decided to try and write more of him. 
> 
> This fic will have some mostly one sided Lawlight in it but this is for the most part a BeyLaw fic 😍

Shinigami. Death Notes.

It reeked of impossibility, but it was now fact. L turned his head and stared at the tall, white monster who called itself Rem as if to remind himself (for the thousandth time) that yes, this was real.

L dealt with facts. Facts were consistent and comforting. Any anomaly was irritating to him. Any anomaly like him…

_'I don't know why I have the eyes, L, I wish I didn't have them because they upset you… but, if you ever need me reach out to me… maybe I can help?'_

L closed his eyes and let out a measured sigh. Dare he reach out to the one who both thrilled and terrified him? His shadow was somewhere in Japan, probably monitoring his every move just as he always did. On paper Beyond Birthday died of a heart attack in prison, but L knew better. L was the one enabling the serial killer to live his life in freedom.

_'Heh. That makes me a hypocrite since I want to convict Light so badly. Beyond's death toll isn't nearly as high but the things he did to some of them…'_

"-Zaki?"

L blinked and turned to find Watari leaning over him. He hadn't heard a word the man had said. He felt Light's keen gaze on him and inwardly cursed himself. Any show of weakness this late in the game could be disastrous and it was bad enough he'd screamed when he found out Shinigami were real…

"I apologize, Watari, I was far away in thought. What did you say?" L asked in monotone, sterile Japanese.

"I asked if you would come with me for a moment, Ryuzaki. I believe there has been a development you should be made aware of"

"You mean we right?" Matsuda butted in.

Watari turned icy blue eyes to the rookie cop. Once Matsuda had withered beneath the heavy gaze, Watari shook his head. "This is of a _personal_ matter that concerns Ryuzaki _alone_ "

L spotted the calculating gleam in Light's eyes and immediately recognized what he was doing. Light was thinking if this new development could prove useful to him. Light dissected everything and planned every move he made with meticulous details just as L himself did.

_'We are something of a matched pair, however I feel with the Shinigami's presence and the change in Light I am soon to lose ground. I might have to call Beyond in on this soon…I don't want to admit it but...I need him'_

"Very well" L replied in English (to piss Light off more than anything, he knew the teen detested him reverting to his mother tongue since he found it difficult to follow) "Let's go"

L followed Watari into his private side office. As soon as the door was closed behind them he flopped onto the sofa and curled his legs underneath him. He would never let anyone see him so relaxed but Watari. He could never be so relaxed and unguarded with anyone but his old mentor.

"So?" L asked without preamble, "This is about B isn't it?"

Watari smiled at L and sat down next to him. In a moment of unguarded affection he reached out to ruffle the mop of black hair on L's head. L leaned into the touch, gray eyes sliding closed at the familiarity of that large, withered hand stroking through his hair.

"It is, my boy. I cannot say what has caused it but I sense a pivot in the investigation. It is time you brought Beyond on board now, L. You know my opinion on his involvement and his past... misdemeanors. I still believe there is hope for him. For the both of you"

L nodded. Watari had wanted B to be brought in on the Kira case the second it was revealed Kira could kill with a name and a face. Those strange eyes of his former successor were an asset L had been reluctant to utilize. Now it appeared he had little other option but to use them. The alternative might be losing and death.

L was more disgruntled about the _losing_ part. Everyone died and he was more than willing to lay down his life to close the case but the notion of losing to Kira?

It turned his blood to ice. He was L. He did not lose. And especially not to an arrogant, twisted little boy who was playing at being a _God_. 

"Where is he, Watari?"

"Currently living under the alias Ben Dover-"

L snorted. Of course Beyond would choose something like that.

"Yes, _quite_. Anyway, as I was saying he is based in Shibuya" Watari continued, "He has been here for quite some time, waiting for you to contact him most likely"

Or willing to step in if necessary. Beyond Birthday might be a killer but L knew the man would die a thousand times to protect him. To have Beyond as an enemy was a terrible thing but to have him as an alli was to have someone fiercely protective and loyal. They were two of his more positive character traits. 

L's body automatically unfolded and curled in on itself into his trademark 'thinking' crouch. He worried his thumb with his lip as he stared vacantly into the distance.

Knowing better than to disturb L when he was thinking hard about something, Watari waited patiently for those sharp gray eyes to regain focus.

"Bring him in" L finally mumbled, decision reached. "But bring him in as my _lover_ , Watari. I don't want any of the team to find out who he really is. Light and Misa will know, of course, but they cannot reveal anything without putting themselves at risk. And that is _if_ the Shinigami chooses to tell them. Beyond will immediately be able to identify Light and Misa as Kira's one and two. It is the Shinigami we have to be careful of though… I am confident Beyond will be able to treat with it and make some sort of alliance. He was always good at talking people round"

Watari smiled dryly, "Always good at talking _you_ around, you mean"

Memories of muddy knees, running in the rain and clandestine, childish kisses ran through L's mind. Beyond Birthday was the only person on the planet he could honestly say he had ever felt those sort of feelings for. Beyond had been his first when they were fifteen and shy. They'd made love in the dark, awkward and fumbling with racing hearts and wide eyes…

L tore himself away from those memories. They were distractions he did not need right now.

"Indeed" L finally mumbled, "Please send Aiber and Wedy to meet with Beyond and invite him here at the earliest opportunity"

Watari smiled, both pleased and relieved L's stubbornness over involving Beyond Birthday had ended. He knew L wanted to solve the case by himself but even he needed outside help at times. With those strange violet/red eyes of his and his cunning, razor-sharp mind, Watari was positive Beyond Birthday's involvement in the Kira case would tip the balance in L's favour once again…

"Now. Tell me what you think about Rem and what her motivations are, Watari. I have a suspicion she is actually rather fond of Misa Amane. She is always watching her or standing close to her. Misa does not currently have her memories of being Kira and I believe we can use this to our advantage… "

******************

_'I need to find out what was said in that meeting between L and Watari'_

Light pretended to be hard at work profiling the latest batch of Kira victims, but he was concentrating on far more important things. He was maneuvering Rem into a position where she would have no option but to sacrifice herself to protect Misa from L's suspicion.

Except L had performed a rather abrupt (and unexpected) U-turn and had permitted Misa to hang around Kira HQ for as long as she liked. In fact, L was being congenial and friendly to the bleach-blonde idiot. Light knew L would never act so affable to her unless it was of some benefit to him.

Rem was watching their interaction closely. After his secret meeting with Watari, L seemed different. His eyes gleamed with knowledge and secrets and it set Light's teeth on edge.

Knowledge in that mind, his rivals brilliant, cunning mind, was dangerous indeed. L was plotting something and it involved Misa Amane.

"Ryuzaki! You're blushing!" Misa squealed as she peered closely at L's face. "Oh my god! I can't believe it you sly old thing, when is he arriving?!"

 _'Wait. What?'_ Light whipped his head around to where Misa and L were sat on the sofas talking.

"This afternoon. I've asked you to show him around, Misa, because I know you are very good at meeting and greeting people. I am aware the timing for his introduction is a little… off, but Ben has been asking to stay for a while now and I'm getting a bit tired of all the sneaking around" L had a finger curled to his lip and his eyes were glimmering with amusement.

_'You're lying, L, and you aren't even trying to hide it. Misa is too stupid to see through it but I can. Who is this Ben? Another detective you're bringing in to watch Misa and I?'_

"MisaMisa is so excited! I will show him around and help him settle in, Ryuzaki! MisaMisa will even help him unpack if you want!" Misa was bright eyed with excitement. Without her memories she was even more obnoxious and abhorrent to Light. He'd been waiting for the right time to return her memories to her, but L's schemes had interrupted things. He needed some time to reassess the situation. L's sudden 'friendship' with Misa would not help matters. He wanted L to be accusing Misa of being Kira again to set Rem off, not cozying up to her on the couch!

"Thank you, Misa. You know, I am actually rather glad I was incorrect about you being the second Kira. I apologize for being rude to you as well"

Matsuds's jaw nearly hit the floor. Even Rem seemed surprised.

"Awww, Ryuzaki! It's okay, everyone gets things wrong at times. Even you, Mr super-duper detective! Does that mean you do not suspect Light too?"

L sighed and shook his head. "There is a 13% chance Light was Kira. I do not believe he is Kira currently, but I have been throughly convinced of MisaMisa's innocence"

Rem seemed to smile at the words, ugly thick lips curling upwards in satisfaction. L Lawliet was not a threat to Misa. That could change, of course, and if it did she would do what she must to protect Misa but for now the Detective was safe. His suspicion of Light was of no consequence to her. She had no loyalty to Light Yagami.

Light seethed, his eyes narrowing in hatred. How had L figured out he was planning to use Rem against him? There was no way the Shinigami would tell him L's name and she wouldn't write it down if L was not a threat to her dear dolt.

"Well, I know Light would never do something so horrible and if he were Kira he must have been controlled by that ugly notebook" Misa declared, eyes shining adoringly at Light. 

L found it quite sad that she was still so devoted to him, even without her memories as Kira. 

"Perhaps" L smiled, "Higuchi is dead and there is still much to learn about the Notebook. I would like to talk to Rem-San, if she could answer some questions?"

Rem stepped forward, "You wish to speak to _me_?" She asked, surprise evident in her tone. She had, thus far, been ignored by the Task Force after she refused to answer their questions when they'd first acquired the Death Note. She had been expecting L Lawliet to try and question her again.

"Yes. I am aware you know substantially more than what you are willing to divulge, however I have no intention of asking you questions directly related to the Kira case or to Kira's identity. That is my job, afterall. I would like to ask you about ownership of the Death Note. Technically it is mine since Higuchi is dead and I've claimed it. It is in my possession. Is that why you are here?"

Rem nodded her head slowly.

 _'Think, Rem, I know you are prone to panic and emotion. Do not let him trip you up!'_ Light thought with urgency. He could only hope Rem could pick up on his feelings. He needed to find a blindspot and retrieve the other Death Note from where he'd buried it as soon as possible. He couldn't risk returning Misa's memories to her yet, not until he had identified what L's next move was.

"So you are haunting me, is that correct?" L asked softly. The rest of the Task Force were following the conversation with rapt attention.

"That is correct" Rem answered hesitantly.

"Oh. I thought so. I am not going to use the Death Note, Rem-San. So does that mean you are stuck here until I do or until you kill me?"

" _Ryuzaki_!" Aizawa gasped. How could the guy sound so disinterested when he was discussing his own potential death at the hands (claws?) of a monster.

"Should you choose to use the Death Note the agreement between a human and the original owner, the Shinigami, is that I will write your name in my Death Note. If you choose not to use it and relinquish ownership of it then I will have no reason to write your name and all memory of me will be erased"

"I suppose the same goes for if I decided to burn the Death Note" L's eyes gleamed. Rem was intelligent but she was no match for him. He saw the potential to exploit the Shinigami but he knew he would have to be subtle about it. Subtle wasn't really his style but it was Beyond's…

"Yes" Rem once again nodded her head. L's questions were vague and seemed to be centered on himself as the owner of the Death Note, but she sensed there was more he wanted to say.

"Rem-San, I have something I'd like to discuss but I would prefer to do it in private" L went in for the kill, flicking his eyes to Light as he spoke; "It's about someone I know. My boyfriend. He can see names and numbers above people's heads. He has 'the eyes' and has always had them since he was a little boy. At first I thought he had a psychological issue but I can only deduce he is being genuine. Does this mean he has a Death Note too?"

"Are you dating Kira?" Matsuda squawked. Light curled his fingers into the palms of his hand and squeezed so tightly he could feel his nails digging into the flesh of his palms.

"No, Matsuda, Ben is not Kira" L replied sternly, "He doesn't even match the profiles"

_'Shit! Shitshitshit! Think, Light. He's said this in front of the team to get a rise from you!'_

"... I will discuss this with you in private" Rem agreed. Her curiosity was piqued. She knew of a human who had been born with the eyes after the Shinigami Beruta dropped his eyes to Earth upon his death. She had heard stories about this anomaly and had been interested in finding out more about him. It was very interesting indeed that the human with eyes not traded for with a Shinigami was dating L Lawliet.

L dipped his head in thanks and shot Light a secretive, challenging smile.

 _'Your move, Light_ ' L thought as their eyes met. Light's face was impassive but L could see the fury lurking in those amber eyes.

L didn't like to be proven wrong, but as he and Rem walked to Watari's office he decided in this case he was glad to be. He should have involved Beyond Birthday sooner because it appeared Rem was interested in him. He'd seen a glimmer of it in her eye…

His phone beeped and L scooped it out of his pocket. He felt his heart race as he read the text:

_**'Finally, you stubborn bastard! I will be arriving at HQ in an hour. See you soon, Lawli-Dearest. Mwah! XxX'** _

L read the message once more before he deleted it and turned to Rem with a smile.

"So, Rem, I have lots I would like to ask you about Ben… shall we?"

Rem followed him into the office. The last thing L saw before he closed the door was the icy glare of Light's eyes on him…


	2. Meeting B

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> B introduces himself to the Task Force and their reunion leaves L shaken. Beyond realises L is just as emotionally constipated as ever and is determined to win him around. Unfortunately, so is Light...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't really written much for this fic so I don't know when it will be updated next, but I do intend to make a decent start on it and prewrite some more chapters once 'DrDr!' Is finished. 
> 
> Enjoy!

"Darling!" Beyond cooed, his eyes lighting up as Watari lead him into HQ headquarters. L turned with a start and gulped as their eyes met. It had been years… 

L didn't even have to fake his surprise as he was suddenly pulled into a strong pair of arms. He felt so warm and for a second everyone else faded away. It was just him and Beyond, embracing like they used to when they were teens. While the reunion wasn't exactly the way he'd planned it (and he had spent hours daydreaming about it over the years) it was just as sweet and poignant. The past slipped from their shoulders like rain and L was content to just let himself be held for a moment and breath in the achingly familiar scent of cloves and cinnamon from those sweets Beyond loved so much. 

"Your hair…" L mumbled, one hand drifting up to touch the artfully shaggy mop without him even fully realizing what he was doing. Beyond looked so different with his natural hair and it had been years since L had seen it. How he had hated Beyond copying him! Yet he had never been able to find the words to fully express it. He wanted Beyond to just be himself. He loved Beyond (and hated him too) as himself. He had never wanted to kiss a reflection of himself, even he wasn't that narcissistic. L wasn't sure what had saddened him more, Beyond's desperate attempts to imitate him to gain his affection (something he already possessed) or Beyond's little killing spree. Both were cries for help and attention, and L felt guilty Beyond had even felt the need to do them. 

Perhaps things could be different now. They were older. Wiser. The spark between them hadn't gone out and L doubted it would. Beyond Birthday was the only person on the planet who owned the deepest part of his heart. It hadn't even been freely given either, Beyond had just somehow wormed his way inside and made L love him when they were little more than children. 

"Do you like it?" Beyond covered flawlessly, seemingly more aware of the surprised team staring at them than L was as L toyed with his hair, pretty eyes wide and vacant. He'd spent years dying his hair black to imitate L, and now he had stripped his hair back to it's natural chestnut brown. L had always been uncomfortable at his efforts to imitate him. Now they were both men not boys, Beyond was determined to show L he was more than some crazed groupie. He wanted to show L who he was, and so, the first step had been to alter his appearance. The second was to aid him in capturing Kira. Should he survive that, the third was to prove to L he was more than just a half-insane serial killer, and could assist him in his cases. Love, Beyond hoped, would blossom naturally between them once again. 

"It's… lovely" The soft hair slipped through his fingers like silk and Beyond smiled widely at the adorable expression on L's face. L was smiling, genuinely smiling and showing his perfect, white teeth and those little dimples Beyond adored. 

_'I've missed that smile. Only I could ever make him smile like that!'_

"Ahem" Watari cleared his throat and L startled, suddenly remembering where they were and who was watching them. Misa was squealing and bouncing from one foot to the other in excitement. 

"Wow, Ryuzaki, Ben is such a catch! You look so cute together" Misa had a stupid, yet innocently sweet grin on her face. 

L flushed as he dropped his hand away from Beyond's head and turned to look at her blankly. "Thank you?"

"How long have you been dating? Ooh, I'm sorry. Where are my manners?! In Misa Amane, it's a pleasure to meet you, Dover-San" Misa bowed her head politely and L felt a little trickle of respect for her. When she wasn't following Light around like a devoted idiot she wasn't so bad. 

"Please, call me Ben. Or B. It's a pleasure to meet you all, too. I've been bugging Ryuu to let me in here for ages! Stubborn man that he is!" Beyond bowed his head back, oozing charm and charisma. "L calls me B all the time. We've been together… what, five years now, Babe?" Beyond wrapped his arm around L's waist and it all felt so fucking authentic L wasn't even sure if he was acting or not. Beyond had a way with people and L had to admit the guy was an even better actor than Light was. 

"Yes, nearly six" L replied faintly, a blush staining his usually palid face at the proximity between them. Beyond always made him feel so muddled but L supposed that was a good thing since Light was watching him closely. Watching for any sign of deception… 

"And what do you do, B?" Light asked pointedly, no emotion on his face whatsoever. 

"If I told you that I'd have to kill you" Beyond replied flatly, his red eyes lingering above Light's head. He had a lifespan but there was something off about his numbers. Owning a Death Note left a mark and Light had it. 'He might not have access to a Death Note now since I can see his lifespan, but L is correct. This boy is Kira and I will kill him'

" _Really_?" Light cocked his head challengingly. He did not like the way Beyond was cozying up to L at all and he was surprised at the hot feeling of jealousy that flared through him. He'd considered seducing L before (especially when they were chained together) to gain his trust and maybe even his real name. He'd dropped that plan when L had either acted or was oblivious to his advances. Now he knew he'd have to resume it and not for entirely pure reasons. He didn't love L, he didn't love anyone, but he didn't want L with the violet-eyed man either. A new game had started now. He'd charm L with everything he had and kill the newcomer, but he needed time to plan first. 

"Mmhmm. I work for the British Armed Forces. Utterly confidential. Well, Ryuu and Watari know but that's it, that's all I can say" Beyond winked and smirked as Misa practically melted into a puddle of goo. He could use that. He needed to keep on good terms with Misa Amane and her Shinigami if their plan was to be a success. 

"Wow! So cool!" Matsuda blurted out, gazing at Beyond with a starry eyed expression, "I'm Matsui-"

Beyond shook his head. "I have the eyes, Matsuda-San, I've had them since I was born. I admire your diligence in using your alias and encourage you to continue to do so, but there is no need with me. I can see everything. By the way, a pleasure to meet you too, Shinigami-San" 

Rem blinked in surprise as the anomaly dipped his head to her. Squeaks of surprise rang out and L smiled smugly as Light's eyes narrowed faintly. ' _That's right, Light, what are you going to do now? If you retrieve the other Death Note I'm convinced you've stashed away, Beyond is going to see it. You won't be able to use Rem to kill me either. Beyond will charm the pants of her and Misa. Seems you're in a catch 22…'_

"Greetings… B" Rem said carefully. Of course she could see Beyond's real name and she knew there was more to the Detective's relationship with the newcomer than what met the eye, but she wouldn't say anything about that. She simply didn't want to give Light any information that could aid him. Already she was considering the possibility of an alliance with L and B to save Misa and condemn Light as the sole Kira. 

"Ryuu said you'd like to speak to me about my eyes? Please come find me later and we'll have a chat" Beyond smiled widely at the Shinigami, "I'm sure we have much to discuss, hmm?"

"Indeed" Rem replied, eyes drifting to Misa. She would keep that girl safe no matter what. 

"Excellent!" Beyond hastily shook hands with Mogi, Aizawa and the others as formal introductions were made. At no point was it mentioned B would be assisting officially with the case, but Light and Souichiro knew he would be. L wouldn't just bring anyone to HQ, even his partner, for anything other than work. 

"Baby, I'm a bit tired after the flight. Care to show me to our room?" Beyond turned to L and smiled softly, eyes fixed on his with urgency. Beyond had something to say. 

"Of course. Please return to monitoring for any new deaths. I'll be back later" L bit back his surprise as Beyond linked their hands together and pulled him from the room. To keep up appearances, Beyond began to chatter about the awful food on the plane until they were out of earshot. 

"Beyond" L whispered once they were safely back in their room, "I… what was that? Was that acting or…"

Beyond silenced him by pulling him into another warm embrace. "Partly. I was just overjoyed at seeing you again and wanted to touch you. You don't mind do you? We are supposed to be dating"

L pulled back in surprise. "What? Beyond, that was years ago. Before you went on your little LA killing spree. A lot has changed since then!"

Beyond shrugged. "Perhaps. Your feelings for me haven't. There's a bond between us, Lawli, and I know you can feel it. I'm done hiding in the shadows and waiting for you to recognize what it is. I'm here for you and I am going to help you take down Kira. What happens after that is up to you. I just… I wanted you to see me. The real me"

L bit his lip. He saw him alright, with passionate violet eyes and a deranged earnestness that was both endearing and troubling at the same time. 

"You still love me" L mumbled, the pieces slotting into place. 

"I will _always_ love you" Beyond returned, rapid-fire. "That will never change, whether you choose to stop running away from your feelings and accept them or not"

That hurt because it was true. 

"B… " L hesitated, hating the fact he was hesitating at all. Why did Beyond make him feel this way? It was like the man flipped his orderly world upside its head and twisted everything inside out. Nothing made sense when Beyond was around. All L wanted to do was lose himself in his kisses like he used to. 

' _But we aren't who we use to be. My main priority must be to defeat Kira, that is why Beyond was brought on board. I cannot lose track of that'_

Beyond smiled as L nibbled his thumb. _'I am going to make you fall for me again, L, it's only a matter of time'_

Unsettled yet optimistic, L left Beyond to settle in. He needed sugar and to analyse Light's response to Beyond. He had a feeling the stakes had just risen even higher in the life or death game they were playing. 

Now, feelings and emotions were likely to be involved, called into play and used like weapons… 


	3. Heart to Heart

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> L and Light clash and L and Beyond have a much needed heart to heart. Light plots to get their names by contacting a loyal follower...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay, look at our boys actually talking like adults! 💖

L returned to HQ and plopped himself down next to Light. Beyond was busy settling himself in and was entirely too cheerful for L's taste. He had far too much on his mind, not least how he was going to trap Light Yagami, who just happened to be staring at him and how he was supposed to work out his feelings for Beyond. God, where did he even _begin_?! 

"Yes, Light?" He drawled as the staring continued. 

"You never mentioned you had a boyfriend"

L arched an eyebrow. "There are many things you don't know about me, Light, and I do not believe my personal life has any impact on the case, therefore it's logical I haven't mentioned B"

"So why have you invited him here now? Because of his eyes?" Light asked softly. "The second Kira also possesses the eyes"

L toyed with a cup of jello, his skin prickling as he and Kira played yet another of their games. He was tiring of them now. Perhaps too many people had died or possibly it was just because it had dragged on for six months. Maybe it was even the realisation they were reaching a precipice neither could come back from. Only one of them could win, and that played heavily in L's mind as they sat and chatted over coffee and Kira victims. 

Yes, L decided, it was becoming tedious now. Time to throw some truth into the mix. That should confuse Light whose first language happened to be lies. 

"Yes, I am aware of that fact. That is precisely why I've invited B here" L finally replied, his voice flat. "B is the key to closing this case. I was too stubborn to admit that before but he is just as stubborn as I am. His expertise are vital and… he will protect me from Kira."

Light's eyes narrowed. "So he is a detective then? And no one is safe from Kira, Ryuzaki, even you"

 _'Especially you_!' Light thought, furious at L's arrogance. He needed to come up with a plan to get the Detective's name and soon. Things were getting dangerous with Rem and L's little boyfriend hanging around. 

L simply smiled. "I would never tell someone like you about him, Light. And I think you know the reason why"

Light kept his face impassive. "Is it because of what happened between us? Does he know about that, L?" Light lowered his tone and smiled sweetly. L loathed that smile. 

' _Do not react to that. He's trying to push your buttons'_ L reminded himself as he glanced away from Light. "If you're implying he'd be jealous about that singular time we were intimate, you'd be correct. However, he also knows about it so you do not have blackmail leverage. Sorry to dissapoint"

Light seethed. L was acting entirely too confident for his liking. He'd screamed when he first saw Rem, and yet know he was having private chats with her! It was like B's presence gave him strength and that wouldn't do at all. He glanced around to check no one was listening in or too close by, before he discretely touched L's knee. 

"I wish it had been more than one time" Light lowered his voice softly, big amber eyes staring at L with longing "You can't deny there is a chemistry between us"

L smirked sardonicaly. 'I bet that line works on all the girls. Too bad _I'm not a girl, Light. I can see you for what you really are'_ "Mm, I'd prefer to see it as something of a mistake and one not to be repeated. I certainly wouldn't call it chemistry If anything, it was just a natural human reaction to close proximity" L dumped his empty jello pot on Light's side of the desk (because it did so annoy the neat freak) and slouched off the chair, knocking Light's hand away. Of course he would try something like this now! "Anyway, I'd best be off. I want to make sure Ben's settled in"

"Deny it all you like, but you know there's something between us"

L paused in his steps. He couldn't deny that because it was true and he made a habit of never lying to himself. He needed to face the truth, however difficult it may be because he was a Detective. How could he get to the bottom of things if he willfully shut his eyes to truths he did not want to see? His feelings for Light were complicated to say the least.There certainly was a sexual attraction between them, that was simply undeniable. But there was also hatred and anomisity on both sides. He knew what Light was trying to do: get close to him so he could rip him apart with each letter of his name. That was how Kira operated. The attraction between them was simple: they loved pushing one another to the limit. Sex had been another game and another battleground. There wasn't the love he shared with Beyond, nor the gentleness despite Beyond's crimes and their rocky history. He didn't even believe Light Yagami was capable of truly loving anyone but himself. 

_'I might be attracted to him but I do not love him. I never could love him. Beyond is the only-'_ L's thoughts fell silent as Beyond sauntered into the room. 

"Hey, Baby, wondering what was taking you so long" Beyond smiled widely at the look of irritation on Light's face. "Oh, is he boring you again?"

Matsuda bit his lip and tried not to giggle as Light scowled at Ben. Having Ryuzaki's boyfriend hanging around HQ certainly brought more energy to the place! 

"Quite" L still felt uneasy about Beyond but damn did the guy make him feel comfortable at the same time. There was too much history and familiarity between them. It felt right to have Beyond at his side again. The man should have been his successor after all… 

"Ryuu and I were just talking about the past" Light said pointedly, unable to keep the slight sting from his tone. 

"Oh yeah? How long has he known you? Six months? Not much of a past, is it?" Beyond replied breezily, plucking L's hand up and kissing it. "Darling, I know you're busy but I was hoping I could borrow you for a moment"

Aizawa and Mogi shared an astonished look. L being called Darling and being asked upstairs for what they figured was sex was something that was clearly going to take some getting used to. For as long as they'd known him it had been assumed by the taskforce he was a stoic, overly dedicated workaholic insomniac who was married to his job and had no people skills. Apparently some of that wasn't true. 

"Of course. The team are heading home soon. Watari, if you need me please ring. I'll see you in the morning"

Watari dipped his head, pleased at the lack of hostility between L and B. L was a stubborn boy but Watari was certain a reconciliation between the two young men would occur. 'It has to. It isn't healthy for either of them to be apart from one another for very long. Beyond ends up going on killing sprees to gain L's attention and L essentially turns into a machine!'

"I will. Do try and rest, Ryuzaki" Watari replied warmly, eyes twinkling as L flushed. When they were little boys at Wammy's House, L had never been able to sleep properly unless he was curled up with Beyond. Even as children the bond between them had been strong and Watari had quickly given up on trying to keep them apart. L always found a way to sneak back into Beyond's bedroom or vice versa. 

Light bit his lip as he watched them leave. He needed to speak to that prosecutor urgently… 

He'd reached out to Kira to offer his assistance, and now Light needed it. He needed someone to dig up his notebook and keep up his noble cause as Kira until the time came he had L and Ben's names. 

And he was determined to get them, no matter the cost. 

****************

"So…" Beyond watched L as he stared glummily out of the window. "Are you coming to bed or not, Lawli-Dear, because I'm getting a bit fed up of staring at you staring out the window-"

"Beyond, what is it that you want from me?" L asked as he spun around, exasperation written all over his usually placid face. "Do you have any idea how difficult this is? Are you trying to pretend things can just… go back to how they were? You left me! And you left to go on a bloody murder spree to boot. That hurt"

Beyond sighed softly. 'Well, I guessed it wouldn't be long before he brought that old chestnut up again. He doesn't know about me. It's time we had this chat' 

"Okay, first of all, I said I was sorry about that. You were balls deep in cases and I felt like you were just… not even with me anymore. You know why I kill, L. I have to. Comes with the territory of being half-shinigami. Yeah, that's what I wanted to tell you before you fucked off to Paraguay! There's so much more to that legend of the Shinigami dropping its eyes to Earth. I have Shinigami blood in my veins. Rem confirmed it"

L clenched his hands into fists. ' _Shinigami blood and half insane. God, Why do I care about you so much, Beyond? You always used to say you weren't fully human yet now it's 'half-shinigami? I shouldn't even be surprised really'_

They stared at one another until Beyond rolled his eyes at his love's utter inability to communicate. 

"I know it's gonna take some time and I'm really not expecting us to start fucking like bunnies again… I mean, unless you want to. I'd be totally down for that but-" Beyond uttered a soft giggle at the thunderous look on L's face. He was always so easy to wind up! "Seriously, L. I'm here because I love you and I want to help you. That's it. No ulterior motive. I want us to work past our differences and work together as a team like we were meant to do!"

L cautiously approached the bed. "I don't know if we can. I don't know if I can"

"Well, you can try. That's all anyone can do. The alternative is losing to that preppy prick downstairs and I'm refusing to let that happen. I'm sorry I hurt you, L, but… I guess I just needed some time alone. After A's death and the successor programme falling to shit it was just too much for me to stay at Wammy's anymore. You had your cases and your responsibility and I had nothing! I didn't even have your attention anymore. Do you know…" Beyond's voice wavered with emotion. He cleared his throat and continued, "Do you know you were gone for six months at one time? Not a single phone call! Nothing. I spent every single day staring at your photograph to reassure myself you were still alive. I've fucked up, and boy have I, but so have you. So has everyone. It's called being human, L, you should really try it sometime!"

L opened his mouth to retort but snapped it shut. B's words cut just as deep as they always had because, like always, Beyond was telling him the truth. There was no sharper knife in the world than that. He'd just had his humanity called into judgement by someone who wasn't even fully human. It stung; It was true. 

_'I have to try and open up to him_ ' 

L sat down and pulled his legs to his chest, leaving a cautious space between them. This heart to heart with B had been long overdue and he knew he'd been putting off long enough. There was hurt on both sides here and yet there was love too. Dedication. Beyond was as dedicated to him as always. They had to work through their pain. That wouldn't be an issue for Beyond, the man was comfortable expressing himself. L knew the real difficulty lay with him. But, as Beyond said, he had to try and so he would. Everything dependended on he and Beyond setting aside their differences. The case, their relationship and their future. Watari, damn him, had been right. It was time for Beyond to step out of the shadows and for them to 'sort their nonsense out once and for all' 

"B…" L tentatively reached for Beyond's hand. It was larger than his own, the skin tone darker but it felt like home holding onto it once again. "My feelings for you scare me. You are the only person I've ever trusted with my whole heart. I'm sorry you felt that way and in hindsight… yes, I treated you badly. I was absorbed in cases and I just… shut off. I suppose it's easier for me that way because I… I love you and that vulnerability is something I still haven't gotten my head around. I want to make things work between us" L's voice quivered and he ducked his head so Beyond wouldn't see the tears in his eyes, "I don't want to be alone anymore. It's lonely without you by my side"

Beyond slowly stroked over L's smooth hand with his thumb. "I know. I'm sorry, L. I am sorry…"

"You know, I always used to think you were strange. Even when we were little. Whenever you used to say you were half human I thought it was just a silly little quirk of yours. Then when you told me about your eyes and proved it to me… a lot makes sense now. I was holding you up to moral standards that even I didn't adhere to. I'm a hypocrite, aren't I?"

Beyond chuckled and chanced pulling L in for a hug. L tensed and then relaxed against him, going boneless as he breathed in Beyond's scent and felt those strong arms wrap around him. He was transported back to when he and Beyond were teens. This was how they slept, L with his head resting above Beyond's heart and the strong, unfailing safety of those arms wrapped around him. Beyond had always been super naturally strong and yet he had held L like he was a something precious. 

"Yes, Lawli, you are. But so are most people. Find me someone who isn't a hypocrite and I'll find you a pink unicorn"

L snorted in amusement. Beyond always made him laugh. "Good luck finding one of those"

Beyond smiled and pressed a gentle kiss to L's forehead. "Exactly"

L felt a flicker of hope rise within him and closed his eyes. It was like magic; when he was in Beyond's arms he could switch off and sleep soundly. Beyond smiled as he listened to L's breaths even out into those of restful slumber. 

"I meant what I said in the treehouse, L. I would give my life for yours a thousand times over. As a kid I thought it was showing you respect: emulating you. I guess now were adults I can see why it made you uncomfortable. I'm sorry about that too. More than the murders, if I'm honest"

But L was already sound asleep with the faintest shadow of a smile curving his lip. 

******************

It was difficult, but Light had managed to find a blindspot in the fortress L had built. The boiler room was not, to his knowledge, being monitored. Light snuck inside and contacted Mikami. He didn't dare ring the man but he sent an email from a burner address specificying where Mikami could find his Death Note. He informed Mikami of Ryuk and ordered the prosecutor to send Ryuk to him straight away. 

If Mikami followed his orders without fail then Light would entrust him with acting as his proxy. If he didn't… Well, he doubted Ryuk would turn down a few apples in exchange for writing the man's name down. 

'I need to draw L away from Ben. To do that I'm going to need Misa out of the way…' Light smiled to himself as he walked out of the room to return to work. L might think he had the upper hand with his boyfriend on the case, but Light had faced worse odds and won. 

He was looking forward to smirking down at that arrogant Ben when he died. Perhaps he'd keep L alive a little longer to relish his pain and suffering before he wrote his name down too. 


	4. Fueling the fire

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> L and B worked together to distract the Task Force and allow L time to treat with Rem. B does what he does best, pushing people's buttons, and enjoys every minute of it!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love Beyond. I love him so much ❤

When L woke up, the first thing he thought of was how warm he felt. He couldn't remember ever waking up and feeling so warm and at peace. It took a few seconds for his fuzzy brain to kick into gear but when it did his eyes widened comically. 

Beyond was smirking down at him and stroking his hair. 

"Morning, Sweetie" Beyond cooed, a devilish glint in his eyes. "You were sleeping like a baby so I took it upon myself to ring Watari and let the others know you were having a lie in today"

"B!" L yelped, mortified as he grabbed his phone and saw the time. It was 10:34! Practically midday! He'd wasted  _ hours _ on sleep! 

"Oh, don't be like that" Beyond snickered as L scrambled out of his arms and immediately headed for the ensuite to freshen up. "You obviously needed the rest, 'Mr I don't need sleep even though I fucking do cos I'm actually a normal (ish) human being despite what my arrogant ass thinks'!"

"Shut up, B!" L growled around his toothbrush as he hastily scrubbed at his teeth. "God, you're so bloody annoying!" He added, wondering how the hell he had tolerated Beyond's yapping for all those years before (and how he had  _ missed _ afermentioned yapping too) 

All B heard was mumbled curses but it made him smile anyway. How he'd missed his dear Lawli in the mornings after he'd slept. For most people, they'd wake up feeling refreshed and well rested. Not his Lawliet. He woke up like a hedgehog with a hangover. 

"Well, look at it this way, this change in your routine is bound to irritate Light and surely that's a good thing, hm?" Beyond trilled as he climbed out of bed and had a nice stretch. "By the way, why on earth did you sleep with  _ him _ ? Please don't tell me his cock is bigger than mine. I don't think I can take it"

L spat out a mouthful of toothpaste into the sink and rolled his eyes in the mirror at Beyond, Beyond who was casually leaning against the bathroom door and watching him intently like an overgrown puppy. Or  _ wolf _ . 

"I don't really know. Proximity? Loneliness? Wanting to get under his skin?" L listed off his 'reasons' even though none of them were strictly true. He supposed wanting to get under Light's skin was nearest to the truth. Possibly followed by loneliness. Proximity had nothing to do with it. 

"Well, you certainly got under  _ him _ " Beyond quipped, and snapped his fingers at his joke, but it appeared he was the only one who found it funny. "In all seriousness though, I'm obviously not  _ happy  _ you fucked him but I know you love me and I wasn't exactly around soooo…What I need to know is if his cock is bigger than mine? Seriously. Tell me!"

L let out a long sigh but couldn't stop the small smile tugging at his lips. Beyond was just so fucking childish at times. It was as endearing as it was annoying. "He isn't" he replied curtly, "And even if he  _ was  _ it isn't a pissing contest, B"

"I beg to differ" Beyond muttered darkly, imagining pissing all over that auburn-haired little shit.  _ 'Wait. Isn't that what they call 'Water Sports? Cos Ew. I don't mean it in that sense…' _ Beyond's face scrunched up as he tried to pick  _ that _ one apart.  _ 'Man, I really do need to start writing in my therapy journal again. The stuff this grey lump in my head comes up with!' _

"I need to shower" L said firmly as he pushed Beyond out of the bathroom. "And I'd like some privacy to do that" he added, as Beyond continued to stare into space thoughtfully. 

Beyond pouted as he finally realised what L had just said. No naked Lawliet. What a Shame! 

_ 'Well, Rome wasn't built in a day!' _ He reminded himself. He'd just have to be patient and give his Lawli the time he needed. Hopefully they'd be at it in the shower like the good old days in no time at all. 

"Of course. I've actually showered already when you were sleeping, so I'm just gonna chuck some clothes on and head downstairs. Mither Imagay and get a good look at those numbers of his. I'll try and ruffle some feathers and get Rem talking too"

L was smiling before he could stop himself and Beyond pinched his cheek. How he'd missed those dimples! 

"I love seeing that. I love seeing a side to you that no one else does. I love you so much, L" Beyond leaned in and pressed his lips to L's cheek in a sweet, chaste kiss. 

L flushed red and his heart pounded like crazy as Beyond abruptly turned and closed the door behind him. 

_ 'God help me, I'm still so in love with you, you absolutely idiotic genius' _

L shook his head but, now he was alone, he couldn't stop himself from smiling and touching the part of his face Beyond had just kissed… 

******************

"Morning!" Beyond chirped as he strolled into Task Force headquarters and snagged a jam donut from Watari's trolly. 

He was greeted by baffled 'Good Morning's' from the Task Force and a barely concealed glare from Imagay. Watari simply smiled and set about preparing his coffee. Beyond always did have a knack for making an entrance! 

"Where's Ryuzaki?" Light asked when Beyond plopped down on the sofa's and bit into his donut. 

"In the shower" B replied around a mouthful of pastry, enjoying the wince Light made at his lack of manners.  _ 'What a prissy little shit'  _

"Did he sleep well? It's unusual for him to sleep so late. Or to sleep at  _ all _ really" Light continued, trying to work out what L's newfound rest would mean for him. Would sleep make L more productive? Was that even possible? The man was practically a machine that ran on coffee and sugar as it was… 

"He slept like an angel" Beyond let his eyes go big and soft, earning himself an 'Aww!' From Matsuda and Misa. "Now I'm back I will make sure he sleeps more cos I'll wear him out if you know what I mean" Beyond gave Light a salacious wink and Light's jaw set in irritation. 

"I'm sure Ryuzaki wouldn't like to hear you talking like that" Souichori muttered, shocked at the man's brashness. 

"Eh, probably. He's such a shy little thing" Beyond sighed dreamily, "But I love him for it"

Light grit his teeth.  _ 'I am going to relish writing every fucking letter of your name, 'B'!' _

Light's eyes snapped to the doors as they opened and revealed L, hair spiked wildly and still damp after his shower. He'd love to say L looked slovenly. He  _ should _ look slovenly, but somehow the damp hair just made him look  _ cute _ . 

"Morning" L mumbled as he slouched into the room. 

"Good morning, Ryuzaki" Watari beamed, "I hear you actually managed to sleep"

L shot Watari a 'Don't you dare say it' look and snagged a donut, very much like B had done. "Mm. I did. Anyway, any new developments?"

"No" Aizawa answered stonily, "No new deaths to report"

"Well, that's  _ marvel _ ous" Beyond accepted his cup of tea from Watari with a small nod. "I've been mulling it over. I believe Rem here knows who Kira is but the sly old thing isn't willing to say. But, not to worry. As soon as Kira regains their Death Note these" Beyond tapped his eye, "Will see everything"

Souichiro glanced at his son. Was it possible Ben was even more eccentric than L himself? 

"Rem?" Misa tilted her head, "Whose that?"

Rem's single eye narrowed at Beyond. What was the hybrid playing at? 

"Oh, don't you worry your pretty head about  _ that _ , Misa-Chan. Rem is just the Shinigami who was attached to Higuchi's Death Note. Trust me, we're doing you a favour by not letting you see her. Hid-E-Us! "

Misa giggled, completely unaware of what a Death Note even was anymore. Light seethed at Beyond's arrogance. He glanced at Rem and wondered if the insult would be enough to make her write his name down. Sadly, it wasn't. 

_ 'If Mikami proves his loyalty soon I will have him make the eye deal with Ryuk. Then I will smuggle surveillance footage of Ben and L to him. He will see their names and write them down. I have to be patient, though. I can't move yet. I must wait for the right time. Ben is going to die first' _

"Anyways, I'll leave you guys to it. I've got work of my own to do" Beyond strolled over to L's spare laptop and logged in easily. "Babe, our anniversary, really?" He snickered, mainly to cover up his hacking skills as he easily navigated L's security and accessed his files on Yotsuba. 

"Oh, shut  _ up _ " L grumbled, tips of his ears turning red since the anniversary of their first kiss actually  _ was _ one of his passwords. 

"Wow, Ryuzaki" Matsuda chuckled, "I never would have pegged you for the sentimental sort!"

L turned to Matsuda with a baleful stare. "Well you don't really  _ know _ me, do you? Enough of this. I want an update on the pending case against Yotsuba sent to me at once. Also, Watari, I'd like you to call in Aiber and Wedy for some survileance work"

Watari nodded and went to email them. He wasn't surprised L had called them in now. He knew who he wanted to be watched as well. Light Yagami. It seemed the net was closing in on the boy who was their Kira in plain sight. 

"Aiber and Wedy?" Mogi asked softly. 

L turned to him. He actually respected the man. He chose his words carefully and only spoke when neccessary. "Yes.They are associates of mine who specialize in survileance. I've decided to have the family members of the Yotusba group currently incarcerated watched. I believe it is possible they may have information regarding Kira"

Obviously he was making the entire thing up. Beyond bit his lip to hide his smirk. The Task Force ate it up and proclaimed it a good idea. Even Light smiled, but that was probably because he thought he'd led L down the wrong path. 

He had no idea the only person Aiber and Wedy would be monitoring was himself. 

*******************

Mikami proved his loyalty. He killed his family without hesitation and then wrote down the fifty names Light had given him. Light smiled down at his phone, triumph flooding through him. He wished he could laugh but he kept it inside. He'd laugh later, when he was smirking down at Ben's corpse and fucking his boyfriend again. 

"Good news?" L asked softly, sharp eyes fixed on Light as he smiled down at his phone. Misa was on her phone too, but L very much doubted they were sending sweet nothings to one another. 

"Not really, just my little sister being a goofball" Light smiled easily. He let his smile drop as he saw the report for the latest batch of killings flash up on his screen. "Oh no"

_ 'Try that again, Light, with feeling' _ L thought sardonically as he saw  _ nothing _ in Light's eyes. 

"Indeed" L commented dryly, "Kira has been busy"

"What is  _ that _ supposed to mean" Light snapped, irritated at the way L implied  _ he _ had been busy. Which was obviously true but the others believed in his innocence so he could hardly admit to it. Things would be so much easier once he'd dealt with L and Ben. 

L arched an eyebrow at Light but said nothing. He really  _ was _ getting sick and tired of this game now. "B, I'd like you to look over the autopsy reports as they come in please"

Beyond shrugged, "Sure" 

"Ben is working on the case now?" Aizawa's tone was savathing and L bristled. It felt like he was under attack from all of them today,and all simply because he'd had a lie on? 

"As my partner I have authorized him to assist me.  _ You _ don't have to work with him. I am the  _ head _ of this investigation, after all, Aizawa-San and my say is final. If you don't like that then you know where the door is" and with that, L shot Beyond a meaningful look, then turned his back on Aizawa and strolled out of the room. He needed some space to sit and think and the roof sounded ideal. He was in a very sour mood. Fifty more deaths, Light sitting their sharing muffins with Matsuda and his team sniping at  _ him _ . Still, he trusted Beyond to buy him a little time. Rem had followed him and L wondered if this was the opening they were waiting for. Treating with a Shinigami wouldn't be easy, but L suspected Rem held no real loyalty to Light. He needed the Shinigami on his side and the easiest way to do that was to speak with it away from the others. 

_ 'Bunch of idiots. They can't see what is right in front of them. I'm in too minds to just get rid of the lot of them!' _ L fumed as he headed up to the roof. He knew he'd calm down soon enough since he didn't really give way to anger often. He breathed deeply and expelled his anger. He needed a clear head for when he treated with Rem. 

Meanwhile, Beyond was irritated on L's behalf. Who the fuck did Aizawa think he was to speak to him like that? L was brilliant. Aizawa was mediocre at best. They all were, really.  _ 'Well, time to fuck them all off!'  _ He thought. L needed as much time alone with Rem as possible. 

"You know, I get you don't like the way Ryuzaki does things, but he's right. He has the authority here, not you. He is vastly superior to you in pretty much every single way.  _ All _ of you, actually" Beyond smirked at Light, amused at the way the teen's eyes narrowed in annoyance. "I'm shocked you'd question your superior like that" he tutted. Aizawa looked about ready to blow. "Still, I guess it shows you aren't really on Ryuzaki's level, huh?"

Watari glanced at Beyond and his lips twitched in a barely suppressed smile. He knew Beyond had his reasons for stirring the pot and soon Aizawa erupted into an angry rant. The rest of the Task Force were listening intently as Aizawa yelled at a calmly smirking Beyond. 

It had been a  _ diversion _ tactic. Rem had followed L and Beyond was creating a scene to cover it up for as long as possible. 

Watari felt a burst of pride in his boys and ducked his head. Together, L and Be really were a formidable team. Even Light hadn't noticed Rem's dissapratance until it was too late. 

*****************

"Lawliet" Rem rasped, her singular eye fixed on L's face. "What is it you wish to speak with me about?"

L smiled pleasently and swung his legs back and forth over the ledge of the roof. "I've figured it all out, Rem-San. Light Yagami is Kira. Misa Amane  _ was _ the second Kira. Now before you write my name down for saying that I think we should discuss how Misa Amane can be… absolved of her actions. I am aware Light planned to use you to write my name down, or something to that affect. That was why I publically cleared Misa Amane the other day. I'm also aware if you perceive me as a threat to her you will write my name down. What if I'm  _ not _ a threat to her but remain a threat to Light Yagami. Would you support me then?"

Rem remained thoughtfully silent until she let out a small sigh. "Misa loves Light. If I turned against him, and to be quite frank with you Lawliet I can't  _ stand _ the boy, Misa would be hurt. I can't allow that to happen"

L nibbled on his thumb in thought. "Have you considered removing  _ all _ of Misa's memories from the last 12 months? She won't be hurt by Light's capture and incarceration if she dosent  _ know _ him"

"We Shinigami can't just toy with the minds of mortals like that" 

L smiled slyly at her. "Perhaps not full Shinigami, but I believe we both know someone who  _ can  _ erase those memories from Misa. Beyond's done it before. He can manipulate people's memories and their minds. If Beyond erased all of Misa's memories would you aid us?"

"I would consider it. I admit I am fascinated by him. Most of my kind is. A Human/Shinigami hybrid is extraordinarily rare. Ask him to make Misa completely forget her Grandmothers name. That will prove his capabilities to me"

L shrugged. That was easy enough. He'd seen what Beyond could do to people. It was one of the reasons why he felt uneasy about him. If Beyond used his powers on him he doubted he could ever forgive it. Beyond knew that. 

But Misa? 

That was fair game as far as L was concerned. "Stay close and Beyond will show you his abilities for yourself" L mumbled as he gazed out over the Tokyo skyline, a small smile on his lips. 

He was gaining ground. 


	5. L's Knight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> L and Beyond rekindle their old passion and Light decides it's time to make his move against L and B as he feels the trap closing in around him...

"Misa-Chan's family were killed, weren't they?" Beyond asked gently as he and Misa sat down to lunch. "I just wanted to say how sorry I was to hear about that and that I can empathize with you. My family were killed too when I was little"

Rem watched their interaction closely. Beyond had insisted on taking Misa for lunch at a local cafe to thank her for helping him settle in. Obviously Misa had been delighted and so had L. L's delight mainly came from the look of utter  _ hatred _ on Light's face as Beyond and Misa strolled out the door. 

Perhaps he could sense he was losing his control over her? Misa hadn't even asked Light if it was okay she went (something she  _ always _ did, even when going to work) and L was actually feeling quite proud of the little idiot. Maybe when she was free of Light's control and without her memories she might even make a good person. 

L returned to his surveillance of the lunch date, eyes fixed on Rem. Everything depended on her compliance. L was working from Watari's private office so he wouldn't be disturbed and he didn't want Light to realize what he was doing either. He fed the Task Force another lie about keeping track of Yotsuba family members and holed himself up with coffee and cake. 

"I'm so sorry, Ben" Misa laid her little hand on his, "It isn't fair, is it?"

Beyond smiled charmingly, his eyes fixed on hers. Misa's eyes widened as she stared at Beyond, utterly captivated by the red that clouded her vision. 

"Beyond…" Rem hissed, a little frightened at what was going on. Beyond didn't take his eyes away from Misa's until he was certain he'd erased the name Aikiho Amane from her mind. He didn't know why, but he'd been able to tamper with people's memories since he was a boy. Perhaps it was the Shinigami eyes or maybe just the power of being a hybrid, but he'd put his skill set to good use over the years. 

No detentions or speeding tickets for Mr B! 

"So, do you have any other relations? I believe I read in teen magazine you had a grandmother in Osaka you were close to?" Beyond abruptly pulled his hand away from Misa's and the connection broke. Misa blinked rapidly as she tried to understand why it felt like she'd just blacked out for a moment there. 

"I uh… yeah, I have a granny" Misa stammered as she took a sip of tea to clear her head. "Her name's…"

Beyond smiled sweetly as a mild look of panic crossed Misa's face. "Yes? Her name?"

"I… I don't remember it! How can I not remember my own granny's name?" Tears flooded her eyes and Beyond felt a little guilty. 

"It's probably just down to stress, Misa-Chan, you have so much going on at the moment. It's obvious you love your granny. Please don't be upset" Beyond cast a meaningful look at Rem, who nodded her head in assent. She'd seen Beyond's capabilities for herself. "Take a deep breath and calm down. You'll remember it"

"Good work, B" L whispered into the small device embedded in Beyond's ear. Beyond's face lit up at L's praise. 

_ 'This is all I've ever wanted. Just to hear him say that. To work with him as equals' _

"Oooh! I'm so silly! Her name is Aikiho Amane!" Misa flushed red, "Gosh, I really must be stressed to have forgotten  _ that  _ for a minute"

Beyond sipped at his coffee. "You know, Doll, maybe you should go on a vacation. Take some me time, you know?"

"But Light…" Misa's shoulders hunched. "He probably wouldn't want me to go and I wouldn't want to just leave him…"

"You could go visit that lovely granny of yours in Osaka, I'm not talking about jetting off to the Seychelles" Beyond laughed gently, "Although they are particularly stunning…Maybe after the Kira case is closed I'll nag my sweet Ryuu into going with me!"

Misa giggled at her new friend. Ben was such a card! She could see why Ryuzaki was head over heels for the guy. 

"I'll go with you" L mumbled into Beyond's ear, "Once we close this case"

"You know… I just might think about that" Misa nodded, her face brightening as their lunch arrived. Rem, unused to seeing Misa look so  _ happy _ , gave Beyond another pointed look. 

"I'm convinced. I will assist you and Lawliet in prosecuting Kira. Who  _ is _ Light Yagami"

Beyond smiled as he bit into his jam donut. It tasted nearly as sweet as his victory. 

*******************

Light cornered him by the lifts. 

"Ryuzaki, don't you think it's a little odd your boyfriend and my girlfriend are having a cosy lunch together?"

L shrugged. "They seem to have hit it off. Hmm, I must admit I am finding myself warming to Miss Amane as well" L pressed the button for the top floor and leaned against the wall as he waited. "I wouldn't concern yourself, Light-Kun, B has no Interest in her that way" he added, a small smirk on his lips. "I know that for a fact"

Light smirked, "Yes, he was insinuating earlier how 'worn out' he was making you"

L held his tongue. He knew Beyond would only say something like that to provoke a reaction. As brash as he was, their personal life was not something Beyond would just talk about. Not without reason. Still, it had clearly rattled Light so L decided to play on it. 

"Well, as embarrassing as it is to admit it, he's right" L slid his eyes to the floor and adopted a bashful expression. "He shouldn't have  _ said _ that though. I will be having words about that"

The lift arrived and as they walked in, Light pressed closer until he'd backed L up against the glass panel. 

"So  _ that's  _ how it is. All the power outside of the bedroom, huh? But inside it… it gets you off to give it away. You  _ loved _ it when I was pounding inside you, L. Bet you're getting hard just thinking about being pinned down and taken, aren't you?"

L didn't stop Light as he leaned in. They were so close their lips were almost touching. If it was an intimidation tactic, it wouldn't work. L held Light's gaze firmly. "Deny it all you want, you know it's true. I could give you everything you want, L. I'm  _ better _ than Ben"

"You would say that" L replied smugly. "But at least Ben knows who he is and what he wants. You're so far in the closet your home might as well be Narnia. Please do keep to your faux hetrosexual relationship with poor Misa and stop poking your nose into mine and Ben's"

L's inner beyond went  _ 'Yeeeeeesss!' _ As Light's face flushed red with anger and embarrassment before that smooth liars mask wiped the expression away. 

"I'm not 'in the closet'" Light growled before surging forward and pressing their lips together. L kept his eyes open during the aggressive kiss and did not kiss back. It was like Light was trying to stake a claim. When Light sucked on his tongue and he felt a moan of pleasure bubble up in his throat, L hastily pushed him away. 

"Don't"

"Why?" Light tilted his head and smiled a long, slow smile that would get most people weak at the knees. 

"Because we are not single people"

Light raised an eyebrow. "So if you were single? We've slept together once already…"

"That was a mistake" L countered, a new plan deliciously unfolding in his mind. If he could convince Light he'd fallen into his trap it would provide him the perfect cover to spring his own… the problem was, B. He knew Beyond wouldn't like this idea one little bit. He'd have to talk to him first. 

"A mistake we both want to happen again" Light argued. 

"..." L stepped out of the lift but turned to look at Light before the doors closed. "Convince me you're genuine and this is more than just power play and I'll  _ consider _ it" and with that he walked away. He let himself into his and Beyond's apart and locked the door behind him. He had a lot of thinking to do and he didn't want to be disturbed. 

He was  _ not _ looking forward to having this conversation with B. But… if he did begin sleeping with Light again it would convince him his manipulations had worked. Light's major weakness was his arrogance. With L as his lover he would get complacent and L would be waiting for him to spring the trap and capitalize on that complacency. 

_ 'First thing's first. We need to get Misa Amane to abandon Kira and get him exposed' _ L thought as he traced his lip with his thumb. He stared out of his apartment window and set himself to thinking, weighing the pros and cons of his plans until he'd given himself a headache. 

******************

B wasn't just opposed to the idea, he was  _ furious _ . 

"No!" He snapped, eyes glowing a dangerous red. "You're mine!"

L's own stormy eyes narrowed in response. "I am  _ mine _ actually, Beyond"

"I can see the merit to your plan, L, but it isn't needed anymore. Rem has confirmed Light is Kira and we have a shot at securing evidence through Aiber and Wedy. It was different before when I wasn't here but I won't just let you toy with  _ my  _ feelings like this now! Didn't you say you wanted us to work together and to heal? That shit ain't gonna happen with you fucking Light Yagami!"

L flinched like he'd been slapped. Yet again this was a prime example of him overlooking feelings to get results. He'd hurt Beyond, of course he had. If it was Beyond suggesting it to him…  _ 'I'd hate it. I'd be jealous and I would probably react the same way' _

L hunched his shoulders and let his bangs hide his eyes. "I'm sorry. You're right. You see things I do not"

Beyond blinked in surprise. L was apologizing to him? Cautiously, he approached and lifted L's bowed head. "I  _ love _ you, L. My heart couldn't take you being with him even if it was just for the case. I know you struggle to express emotions but you have to try. For me? Try for me"

L swallowed thickly and was surprised to feel tears well in his eyes. "I'm sorry" he repeated, feeling useless. "I'm sor-"

Beyond shut him up by pressing their lips together. He tasted the tang of salt on L's lips but they were just as delicious as he remembered. He deepened the kiss and L pressed into him, mouth opening sweetly under his. Beyond poured everything he had into the kiss: his frustrations, his years of longing, his love for L and his frustration at him. When they eventually parted, both were flushed and panting for breath. 

"You  _ are _ mine, L, and I am yours. That's the way relationships work" Beyond said the words softly but there was a hint of steel behind them. He stroked L's cheek and L nodded solemnly. He understood now. 

"Okay" he mumbled, still a little dizzy from that intensely passionate kiss. 

And that was the end of that. It was getting late and they had accomplished a lot, so Beyond pulled L to bed and they curled up together. For a long time neither spoke as they rested against one another, lost in thought. L shifted until his head lay above Beyond's heart and found himself slipping into that murkey place of dreams and memories. 

_ It was raining and they'd been well and truly caught out by the stormy downpour. The two boys hurried to climb up the rickety ladder and into the treehouse as hail began to pelt down on them.  _

_ "Owww!" Beyond yelped as one particularly large stone zipped off his forehead. He held out his hand for his friend and helped L up. As soon as they were in the warm they huddled together for warmth, black and brown hair plastered to their faces.  _

_ The two little boys resembled drowned rats as they shivered and clung to one another.  _

_ "Mr Wammy is going to be upset" L sighed as an ominous rumble of thunder sounded in the distance. "He did say to bring our coats…" _

_ Beyond shrugged and tightened his arms around L. He was shivering and he didn't like it. "It's okay, he won't be too mad, L" he soothed gently. L smiled and rested his head against Beyond's shoulder. Beyond was a year younger than him but acted more like his senior. Beyond was just so compassionate and emotional and L envied him. They were only eight and nine, but L knew in his heart Beyond was his very best friend and would always be there for him.  _

_ "And even if he  _ **_is_ ** _ mad, I'll protect you" Beyond declared bravely.  _

_ L looked up at his friend. Beyond was always saying funny things like that. "Would you?" _

_ "I would" Beyond nodded solemnly, his little face serious. "I would give my life for yours a thousand times over" _

_ L's eyes were huge. "Like a knight in the storybooks?" _

_ "Mmhmm. I'll be your knight. Sir Beyond!" _

_ They giggled as they imagined Beyond in armor and riding a horse.  _

_ "Wait. Wouldn't that make me the princess?" L asked, face scrunching up at the thought.  _

_ "No!! You'd be like… the powerful, wise mage" Beyond was quick to clarify. "Like Merlin. You'd be Merlin and I'd be your knight protector" _

_ L smiled and settled back against Beyond. They were warmer now and the rain seemed to be easing up. When it was bedtime he decided he'd sneak into Beyond's room so they could read 'The Adventures of Sir Lancelot' together again.  _

_ Beyond was quiet as L dozed off in his arms. When he was certain L was deeply asleep he pressed a shy kiss to L's forehead and thought about how one day, when they were grownups, he'd prove to L he was serious. He'd save him from anything.  _

L's eyes flickered open and he lifted his head, the dream still fuzzy and sweet in his head. It was dark and Beyond's head was tipped back, his chestnut hair falling across his face beautifully. 

L slowly pulled himself out of Beyond's loose embrace and pressed a kiss to his forehead. "I'd die a thousand times over for you as well, B"

Beyond smiled in his sleep and L felt a wave of love wash through him. Beyond made him feel human. Beyond just made him  _ feel _ . L settled back down and decided he would tell Beyond in the morning he trusted him and was ready for them to be intimate once more. He craved it. 

Because that simple dream had reminded him that Beyond had loved him for a long time and despite their differences, the bloodshed, the disappointment and the pain between them their love had never changed. Their love was a constant that could always be depended on. 

It was only now L was beginning to finally understand it. 

*******************

The next morning, Beyond awoke to find L sitting next to him quietly, a far away look in his eyes. 

"Morning" Beyond stretched out an arm and took L's hand in his. L finally stopped staring into space and regarded Beyond with a thoughtful look. 

"I dreamed about the treehouse last night. I think it's only now sinking in just how much you love me. I'm sorry for hurting you, Beyond. I suppose it must be difficult loving someone who finds it so hard to express themselves…but I promise I am going to try. For you."

Beyond's eyebrows shot up in pleased surprise. "I mean, it can be  _ difficult _ , yeah, but worth it. I suppose it isn't always a barrel of laughs loving a half-insane, half-human who enjoys killing, is it?"

L cracked a smile. "True. It isn't"

"But is it worth it?" Beyond asked quietly as L lay down beside him. "You do love me, like I love you?"

"Yes it is and I do. Always." L leaned in for a kiss and Beyond cradled his head gently. It started soft and sweet but soon they were kissing passionately, bodies straining to get closer to one another. 

"L…" Beyond moaned, hips shying away from L's as he felt himself harden. L always did have a talented mouth and the way he'd been sucking on his tongue made his toes curl. 

"It's okay. I want you" L mumbled against his lips shyly. "I  _ need _ you"

Beyond pulled away to gaze into L's eyes. "You're certain? It's been a long time…"

L kissed him in answer, pressing close until they could feel how hard they were for one another. 

"Well. Fuck" Beyond let out a breathless giggle of happiness at the press of L's arousal against his. L really wanted this! L smiled and began to undo the buttons on his lover's loose sleep shirt. 

"Yes, that  _ is _ the idea" L drawled, delighting in Beyond's giggle at his pun. 

"Oh, I'll fuck you alright.  _ Later _ " Beyond nipped at L's lower lip. "Want to make love to you first"

L shivered at the soft, lustful words. Oh how he wanted that too. He sighed as Beyond rolled on top of him and began to kiss him again, clever hands working to tug off his shirt at the same time. L's eyes closed as he felt Beyond brush a thumb over one of his nipples. Of course Beyond wouldn't have forgotten how sensitive they were. It didn't matter if it had been years since they'd last been intimate. Their bodies knew and their souls remembered. 

"Aaahh!" L arched his hips as Beyond gently rolled one of them between his fingers. His face flamed hot with embarrassed arousal as Beyond smiled down at him. 

"So cute…" Beyond cooed, captivated by the stunning sight that was L's passion. He'd miss this. Missed that face, those moans.  _ 'I'll give you everything, L' _

L cracked open an eye just in time to see Beyond dip his head. 

"Aaaah! B!" L really couldn't keep his voice down as Beyond began to drag his tongue over his nipple, his fingers toying with the other so it wouldn't be neglected. L felt his cock throb and he writhed under the expert assault, Beyond's name spilling from his lips in a breathless litany of moans. "B! B… oh god,  _ please _ !" L whined as Beyond pulled at his nipple, just boarding on pain. 

"What do you want?" Beyond rasped against L's heaving chest. "Tell me, Baby" perhaps it was a bit unfair to make L say it in the condition he was in but he wanted to hear it. He wanted to lock L's words inside his heart. 

"You. I want you. Please…" L gasped out as Beyond pressed their cocks together to ease off some of the pressure. "I-inside me. Please…"

Beyond nodded, his face suddenly serious and pulled away to tear off his shirt. "Lube?"

L blinked, dazed. "Huh?"

Beyond chuckled and kiss those sweet lips. "I'll get creative then.  _ You _ get naked"

L barely had the presence of mind to strip himself off as he heard Beyond rummage around in the bathroom. He slid his boxers down and bit his lip at how hard he was. His cock smacked into his stomach and he could feel himself leaking. Beyond always did know how to get him worked up. His nippled were red and ached deliciously as he felt the cool air caress his skin. 

"Mmhmm, this will work!" Beyond, gloriously naked, strutted back into the bedroom holding up a vial of olive oil. 

L flushed. "That's F-for my ears"

"I don't care what it was for it's for  _ this _ now" Beyond laughed at L's cute shyness. "I'll go gentle, I promise. I'll get proper lube later as well. I won't hurt you, L, I swear. I'd rather die"

"I know…"

Beyond climbed back on the bed and placed the vial within easy reaching distance. It felt like the first time all over again and this time he was determined to do things right. 

He kissed L's lips, his chin and worked down his neck until he could feast on his nipples again. L was a writhing mess on the bed by the time he'd reached his hips. "Can I suck you?"

"God,  _ yes _ "

Beyond smiled crookedly and took L's cock in hand. He pumped it slowly, eyes fixed on L's face as it twisted with pleasure. "Good?"

"Mm! Good! B!" L was having a hard time not to just buck into that fist. Beyond was moving so slowly and it was as perfect as it was maddening. 

Beyond scooted lower and delicately lapped at the weeping tip. He groaned as he tasted the salty tang of precome on his tongue. L gasped out his name, his  _ real _ name, and curled his fingers in his hair. 

"More, please, I can't-" L babbled as Beyond licked up and down the throbbing vein on the underside of his cock. 

"I know. Don't worry, I've got you. I want you to come in my mouth, I want to pleasure you" Beyond knew it usually made penetration easier when L was as riled up as he was now, and if he was honest, he just wanted to taste his lover again. 

That was the only warning L had before Beyond took him inside and began to bob his head. L threw his head back with a scream as pleasure lanced like fire through his body and burnt him up. Each sunk and moan against his flesh had L shaking and sweating, release hurting towards him at a blistering pace. Beyond knew  _ exactly _ what he was doing and he bucked his hips into Beyond's mouth, his eyes screwed tightly as he lost himself in that perfect, wet heat. Beyond teased him for a few minutes until it was clear L was beyond desperate to climax. 

"B! I need to come!" L managed to rasp out. Spurred on, Beyond hummed around L's cock and bobbed faster to give his lover the pace and rhythm he needed. "Yes! B! Fuck-" L cried, feeling the familiar coil tighten in his belly. "I'm gonna come!"

_ 'Do it then. I need to taste you' _ Beyond thought as he used his free hand to roll L's smooth balls between his fingers. L shrieked and Beyond had a split second of warning before his mouth was  _ flooded _ with salty bursts of come. He groaned around L's pulsing, spurting cock and eagerly swallowed it down.  _ 'Oh, fuck  _ **_yes_ ** _ '  _ Beyond's cock was  _ aching _ with need by this point, but he wouldn't rush this for the world. The first time he'd taken L when they were little more than kids, he had  _ no _ idea what he'd been doing really and had completely skipped foreplay and most of the prep needed in his ignorance. He'd caused his precious one pain. That would  _ never _ happen again.

"Oh god" L panted as Beyond gently pulled away from him. He was pretty certain he'd never come that hard in his life. "Fuck" he moaned brokenly as he shivered through the aftershocks of such an intense orgasm. 

"That's kinda the idea" Beyond quipped, just to ease the tension a bit. L managed a smile between his pants for breath. 

"Such a dick, B" he gasped out, head spinning. 

"I mean, I  _ did _ just suck yours" Beyond pouted playfully. L surprised him by suddenly grabbing him for a kiss. Beyond giggled at how kinky L was. No doubt he could taste himself on his tongue and he must have loved it because Beyond felt L's still half-hard cock twitch against his belly. 

"Your turn" L husked, eyes inky wells of desire, "I want you inside me"

"Yes…" Beyond groaned, cock pulsing at the words. "Stay on your front and wrap your legs around me. I want to see your face" there would be no hard pounding a la doggy style or pushing L's face into the mattress  _ this _ time. Beyond intended to savour every single moment. This wasn't about sex. Not  _ purely _ anyway. This was about trust and rebuilding their relationship. He wanted to look into L's eyes as they did that. 

"Okay" L breathed out, willing himself to relax as Beyond gently guided him into position. L shivered as he felt an oiled finger slowly circle the entrance to his body. Beyond pressed one inside and L took it easily, even rocking back against the finger. 

"So good" Beyond praised as he moved the finger in and out of that incredible soft heat. 

"B" L squirmed, face flushing red as he tried to get him  _ deeper _ . "More…"

Beyond smiled at his lover and pressed another finger inside. L was so relaxed and  _ ready _ for him that his body just sucked him in. He diligently ignored his own arousal and worked L open by twisting and stretching his fingers. As soon as L began to rock his hips, eager for more, he searched for that spot inside him that always made L shin. He found it easily enough (their bodies really  _ did _ remember this) and L rewarded him by making that deliciously sultry whine as Beyond stimulated his prostate. By the time he had worked in a third finger L was clawing at him, hips rolling as he worked himself on Beyond's fingers. In passion, L was utterly shameless and it was beautiful. 

_ 'You're human when I touch you'  _

Beyond  _ finally _ slicked up his cock with the remainder of the oil and bit his lip to keep himself from coming straight away. His dick was practically purple and engorged with blood in its desperation. 

"Gonna enter you now" Beyond panted as he got into position and guided the tip of his aching cock to L's loose, wet hole. 

"Please!" L was trembling and Beyond shuddered as he pressed just the tip inside. They cried out in unison and clung together as L's body clamped down around Beyond. It was a long, slow glide but Beyond was finally home. He panted heavily as he rested his forehead against L's, their hips flush together. 

Beyond wasn't sure if he was crying or if it was L, but their faces were wet and their kisses tasted of salt as he found a slow, gentle rhythm and began to rock in and out of L's body. It was as exquisite as he remembered it to be and he had to clamp down on his urges to just slam himself inside that tight sheath and lose himself in a mindless rut. 

The bed squeaked quietly as they clung to one another, eyes locked as Beyond's thrusts grew a little faster as their excitement grew. 

"So good!" L dug his nails into Beyond's shoulders and shuddered as one deep lunge caught his prostate dead on. "A-ahh! More! Please!"

Beyond lifted one of L's legs to rest on his shoulder, the shift in position allowing him to slide in deeper and faster. L rewarded him by gasping out his name, his cock hard and leaking against his belly once again and one hand clawing at the sheets as Beyond drove him insane with lust. 

"Yes! Fuck, yes!" Beyond bowed his head and nuzzled L's neck as he fucked into him smoothly. "L! L!" His passion was near breaking point and he trembled, body burning with the need to come. 

"Yes, do it" L breathed, one hand reaching down to grip himself. "Need to feel it. Fill me up"

Permission granted, Beyond began to fuck harder and faster, his hips snapping as L stroked himself in time to his movements. The squeaking of the bed grew louder as their gentle love making picked up a pace. The lewd, slick sounds of L's hand on his cock and Beyond's balls slapping against L's ass as he rutted filled the room. Neither could focus on anything other than their desperate need to come. They strained together towards release, lips locked in a passionate, biting kiss. 

"Aaaah! I'm coming!" Beyond pulled his head back and cried out in triumph as he suddenly seized against L and began to shoot inside him. L's chanel clamped around him like a vice as L joined him with a yell of his own, hand skimming over his cock as he spurted between his fingers. 

"Beyond!" L cried, delighting in feeling Beyond's come gush inside him. "Oh, Beyond!,I can feel you! I can feel your come inside me" Beyond watched through slitted eyes as L painted his stomach with pearly ropes of come. He wasn't surprised that he could feel it, he was pretty certain he'd come  _ gallons  _ and by fuck was it everything he'd dreamed it would be.  __

Beyond laughed shakily, hips jerking as he finished spending himself in L's body. "Fuck, so good, Baby. I love you!" He was twitching and shuddering as he kept fucking them through the aftershocks of such sublime pleasure until they collapsed against one another in sated exhaustion. 

Neither of them knew it, but outside a furiously aroused Light Yagami stood listening. His face was set like stone as he listened to their gasped sweet nothings and exhausted pants for breath. He had no idea L could be so passionate! It made him want him urgently. But first he needed to get L's  _ lover _ out of the way. 

"Beyond, is it?" He growled softly. "Well, enjoy it while it lasts!" He stalked away, furious intent pounding through his veins. Fuck waiting. He'd get that footage to Mikami  _ today _ . He knew time was running out. L and  _ Beyond _ were moving against him, Misa was growing distant and Rem was too. He felt the net closing around him but he wouldn't submit to it. He'd rather be dead than rotting away in a cell for the rest of his days. He needed to fight. It was now or never. He wouldn't lose. He had too much to accomplish as Kira. 

He would contact Mikami and get a slip of the Death Note paper for his own personal use because as soon as he found out Beyond's name  _ he _ would be the one writing it…


	6. The betrayer and the betrayed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light's world comes crashing down around him when he walks right into Beyond and L's trap.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the late updates, life is very busy right now so all my fics will be updated slower than usual.

"Kami!"

Light smiled as he excused himself to take this very important phone call. It had been  _ two _ painstaking days and he hoped Mikami had his name. If he didn't, the man would pay dearly for his failure. 

"Yes?"

"It's Beyond Birthday '' Mikami breathed, his excitement obvious. "That's his name, Kami!"

_ 'Beyond Birthday. Now why does that name sound familiar?' _ Light pondered as he rolled the name on his tongue.  _ 'The Los Angeles BB murder cases! Beyond Birthday!' _

"Excellent work" Light said softly, his mind working a mile a minute.He disconnected the call and leaned against the wall outside HQ. He needed a moment to think. Something clicked and he grinned evilly as he remembered just why that name was so familiar. He'd written the man's name down before! However, the man's face had been terribly burnt so it stood to reason it might not have worked. He had to hand it to whoever Beyond's surgeons were, they'd done a good job on his face. He didn't even  _ look _ burnt or scarred anymore. He figured L probably had a part to play in that. For a murder  _ supposedly _ on the run, Beyond Birthday looked rather healthy and content. 

Light walked into HQ and found his eyes straying immediately to L and he smirked.  _ 'Fucking a murderer but condemning Kira, huh, L? What a hypocrite you are. I'll kill your little psychopath and when you've cried enough I'll kill you… unless you renounce him and the case and become mine. Then I will spare you. The only option you have for survival now is to join me' _

L looked up, keenly aware of that burning gaze on him. He stared at Light but said nothing, content to let his gaze speak for him:  _ You don't intimidate me. I'm more than a match for you, Kira. Everything is unraveling for you now. You've lost Misa  _ **_and_ ** _ you've lost Rem! Soon you are going to lose your buried Death Note too.  _

"Morning, Light" Beyond chirped, a knowing gleam in his red eyes. "Sorry to be a downer, but I'm guessing by the flowers and card on your desk and Misa's decision to take a holiday you're dumped…"

_ 'What??!' _ Light kept his face impassive and shrugged off Matsuda's pitying look as he strolled to his desk. He ignored the flowers and picked up the card. The girly handwriting was enough to turn his stomach, almost as much as what the words actually said:

_ Light,  _

_ I'm so sorry but I've come to the realisation that we just aren't working out anymore. I think for a long time I liked you more than you liked me. I mean, we never really  _ **_did_ ** _ anything together and the case always got in the way and… I guess you just didn't want to hurt me by saying so? I understand! Ben has been  _ **_so_ ** _ kind and helpful in helping me realise it. He's such a rock, and such a good listener. I hope you're not too sad but if you are please talk to Ben!  _

_ I really hope you find happiness with someone else and I'm sorry for ending things this way, but I couldn't do it face to face :( I'm taking a break for a while and going on holiday with my Granny! When I get back to Japan I really hope we can be friends?  _

_ Lots of love,  _

_ MisaMisa xxx _

"Wow, that blows" Beyond smirked, reading the card over Light's shoulder. "If you ever want to talk…"

Light gritted his teeth. How  _ dare _ she?! She was supposed to be his eyes! She was supposed to dig up the Death Note and keep doing her goddamn job! 

"Thanks, but I'm fine. Misa is right. I didn't want to hurt her by breaking things off but I suppose this is inevitable. I've been too focused on the case to pay her much attention. I think this is best for the both of us" Light smiled sweetly, earning himself an approving nod from his blissfully ignorant father. 

"Indeed. I hope she's happy" L let his eyes stray to Rem and gave the Shinigami a small, secretive smile that turned Light's blood to ice. That confirmed it then. Somehow, L had set up an alliance with Rem. Rem dipped her head and abruptly turned and walked through the wall. Where was she going? Was she taking orders from L?! 

_ 'I want to write her name down. I want Misa dead but if I kill her now it's going to look utterly incriminating. I've got to write Beyond's name down and get that other Death Note as soon as possible. If I don't, Rem will kill Me.' _

Playing on being upset, Light sat down at his desk and messaged Mikami.  _ 'Change of plan. I can't get the book today. You'll have to write today. Now, Please. ' _ it was risky, sending a message like that, but Light was confident he'd secured his phone and had been vague enough to avoid suspicion

5 minutes later he received a euphoric 'Done!' Along with a screenshot of Beyond's name written down in the Death Note. Light deleted it at once and swiveled his chair to watch Beyond. The man was chatting to Watari, all easy smiles and charm. 

_ '40 seconds, you son of a bitch!' _

Beyond suddenly turned and  _ smirked _ at Light. Light felt his breath catch in his throat at that smirk. It was like Beyond  _ knew _ what he'd done. 

Suddenly, Beyond dropped to the floor and L jumped out of his seat to get to him. 

"What's happening?" Matsuda yelped, his face paling. "Is it Kira?"

L leaned over Beyond and checked his pulse as he killed time. Rem would be back soon and it was imperative they keep Light in the dark (for lack of a better term) until she did. Rem had secured the Death Note and Light's damning letter to Misa, but she was also collecting another important piece of evidence. Teru Mikami and the Death Note that contained the name 'Beyond Birthday'

"Ben?" L whispered, eyes huge and terrified. "Oh god, no…" to stall for time, he faked some quiet sobs as the shocked Task Force tried (and failed) to comfort him. Precious minutes ticked by and L could  _ feel _ Light's smug triumph lick across his skin like flames. 

_ 'Enjoy it while it lasts, Light. It won't be long now' _

Watari, obviously aware of what was happening and playing his part, shielded Beyond's body with his own so Beyond could take a few breaths in between playing dead. Matsuda was panicking and Light was playing the frozen with fear act. 

"I'm so sorry, L" Watari gently touched L's shoulder. "He's gone"

"Kira could not possibly know his name. I don't understand…" L lifted his head and stared directly at Light as Rem appeared. Finally! "Actually… I  _ do _ understand. I've always understood. You, Light Yagami, are Kira and you've just  _ tried _ to kill my lover"

"W-what?" Light spluttered, "Ryuzaki, you don't know what you're saying! You're upset" Light climbed to his feet. " _ Kira _ killed him, Ryuzaki" Light approached him, eager to play the role of comforting best friend. Beyond felt his blood boil as Light reached for L. Over his  _ literal _ dead body! 

That was the moment Beyond chose to sit up and smile sweetly at the Light. "Yes, he can, you cunt, because it's  _ true _ . You, Light Yagami, are Kira and we finally have the evidence we needed to prove it to the lot of you idiotic fucks"

"B" L chastised mildly, even though he actually agreed with the sentiment. 

"Sorry, Babe" Beyond shot L a lopsided grin.

"What's going on here?" Souichiro exploded, a hint of panic in his voice as he saw how  _ shocked _ Light looked. His boy didn't look innocent. He looked infuriated… 

"Well, Light has been using proxies to write down names for him whilst he's been here. The first was Misa Amane, but she has been absolved of her crimes and will not be prosecuted. The second is Teru Mikami, whom Rem has very kindly delivered for me"

It felt like his stomach dropped to the floor, but Light's eyes were not deceiving him. Rem dragged a bound and semi-conscious Mikami into the room. He glanced at the door, sweat prickling on his brow. Could he make a break for it? Or would Rem just write his name down.  _ 'I've… I've lost. I can't believe-' _

Beyond suddenly grabbed him and punched Light square in the face. "That's for trying to kill me"

L opened his mouth to remind Beyond that there were more important matters to attend to, but snapped it shut as Beyond punched Light again. The crack was  _ sickening _ . "And  _ that  _ is for plotting to take L away from me, you prissy little shit"

L ran his gaze from one shocked Task Force member to the next. "I suppose we should explain. Watari?"

Watari had his handgun out and trained at Light's temple. What little colour that was left in Light's cheeks drained away. 

"No! This is a mistake. I'm not Kira-"

A hurt, betrayed whisper rang out through the room. "Kami?"

Light closed his eyes. It was all over. He'd been betrayed… 


	7. Zero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the wake of his revealing as Kira, Light makes one last decision. Beyond prepares to guide L through the dark days ahead...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *TRIGGER WARNING*
> 
> This chapter contains a semi graphic scene depicting cutting and suicide by slitting wrists.

"This… this is a setup" Light tried desperately to garner favour, but no one could look at him. Rem smiled as Light's jaw twitched in an unconscious display of nervousness. 

"Is it? Mikami called you Kami, Light" L took the letter from Rem and read it. "Oh, Light, this is the nail in your coffin… Watari, I would like you and the chief to go and laminate this. It is the evidence we need to convict Kira. Beyond will hold Light" L hoped it was evident to everyone just why he'd asked the chief to go with Watari. He would have no whispers of tampering with evidence to derail the investigation now and he knew every member of the Task Force trusted Souichiro Yagami. His presence during the laminating would prove the documents authenticity. 

"With pleasure" Beyond grinned as he switched places with Watari. He waved Watari's offer of the gun and pressed his switchblade against Light's throat. 

"Move and I slit your throat" Behind growled into Light's ear, relishing the slight bobbing of Light's Adams apple that betrayed his nervousness. 

"Holy  _ shit _ " Matsuda whimpered as he pressed closer to Aizawa. Aizawa groaned in annoyance but made no move to push the office idiot away.

As Watari and the Chief went to laminate the document, L addressed the remaining Task Force. 

"I've always believed Light Yagami was Kira and now I finally have proof. Thank you, Rem" L offered the Shinigami a rare smile. "Please take Teru Mikami to the holding cells and strip him naked. He can have no object on him that may inflict harm"

Rem nodded and picked up the sobbing human in her arms. She would have gladly written his name down but she understood what L's intentions were. The Detective  _ needed _ Mikami to testify against Light. 

"I can't believe this is happening" Matsuda sobbed, turning hurt, betrayed eyes to Light. "We trusted you!"

L smiled blandly.  _ 'Actually, I never did' _

Watari and an ashen faced Souichiro reappeared with the document and L's smile turned smug at the look of  _ horror _ on Light's face. 

"Read it out, nice and loud" Beyond snarled, pressing the dagger against Light's neck and just nicking the skin. 

"I won't read it" Light snapped back, "You won't kill me, Beyond, you don't have the guts-"

L snorted. "Careful, Kira-Kun, I assure you he  _ does.  _ However, I can understand your reluctance to read such a damning piece of evidence so allow me to assist you" L read the letter loud and clear, his eyes daring  _ anyone  _ to doubt its authenticity. He kept his voice flat and to the point as he read out Light's plot to kill him. When he finished he handed the document to Souichiro with a small bow of his head. "I am sorry, Souichiro-San, I did try and tell you all Light-Kun was Kira. I suppose unless you had direct proof you would never have believed me, hmm?"

Souichiro opened his mouth but swiftly closed it. L was shocked to see  _ tears  _ fill the chief's eyes and felt guilty. It was not his intention to torture the poor man. Finding out his son had been Kira all along was bad enough. L looked to Beyond for guidance, glaringly aware of his lack of social skills in such a situation. 

Beyond smoothly stepped in and asked Mogi and Aizawa to handcuff Light. Once Light was bound securely, he went to Souichiro and offered his sincere condolences. 

L wasn't sure how to feel. He was vindicated, yes, but he was also deeply unsettled. He'd proven Light was Kira and he'd saved his and Watari's lives but what next? 

_ 'Execution. That's what's next and that is what is unsettling me. Despite everything I don't want him to die. I want him to repent and actually use that intelligence of his for good purposes. Beyond isn't going to be happy if I try and spare him and I have to consider the need for justice for his victims and their family's as well…' _

Light let his face grow blank. Ryuk would probably find out what had happened and would write his name down soon. He'd lost but he would not debase himself by  _ begging _ to be spared. He still had his pride. "So, are you going to slit my throat or lock me up?"

Beyond let out a low growl and flicked his eyes to L. They narrowed in annoyance as he read L's face. L didn't want Light killed. He huffed in annoyance and pushed Light away from him. It wasn't like the brat could do anything handcuffed anyway. 

"Please prepare a separate holding cell for Kira-Kun and then patch me through to Interpol" L mumbled, tearing his eyes away from the blazing arrogance he saw before him. 

"Fine" Beyond muttered, not pleased with L's sudden softness concerning Light Yagami. He  _ knew _ L loved him but was this hesitation to have Light killed based on emotion rather than rationality? For the first time in his life he was tempted to use his powers on L but held those tempting thoughts at bay. If he did that L would never forgive him. 

Light was escorted to his cell by Aizawa and Mogi and L and Watari busied themselves informing Interpol Kira had  _ finally _ been apprehended. 

******************

Later that evening, L and Beyond sat on the roof and stared out at the Tokyo nightscape before them. The bright neon lights and roar of traffic assaulted their senses as they sat in silence. Finally, L turned to Beyond and took his hand in his. 

"I feel something for Light"

"I know you do" Beyond muttered darkly. "It isn't difficult to  _ see _ , L. So, are you feelings going to prevent you from doing what's expected from you?"

L recoiled as if slapped. "What? I… Beyond! I don't  _ love _ him! I… god dammit, I love  _ you _ ! What I feel for Light is… " L's shoulders slumped. "I don't know  _ what _ it is, I just know his death is going to hurt me and I'm trying to deal with that"

Beyond didn't reply. Instead, he squeezed L's hand to signify he understood. Rain began to drizzle from the sky and Beyond gently urged L to his feet. "Come back inside, L. Come to bed and try to sleep"

L, for once, did not protest. He seemed deeply tired and  _ worn _ as Beyond pulled his T-shirt off and assisted him to change into comfy loungewear. L leaned on him and breathed in that comforting clove scent. 

"Beyond… I noticed the way you looked at Light as he was taken to the cells. What did you see?"

Beyond sighed softly, frustrated that despite L's tiredness he was  _ still _ discussing Light. "His numbers have plummeted"

L's eyes shot open and he gazed up at Beyond. "How low?"

" _ Low _ "

L had nothing to say to that. He didn't trust Light. He didn't  _ like _ him most of the time but he couldn't forget the time they'd spent chained together. Light had been so  _ earnest _ then. He'd even whispered to him in the dark about being afraid he was Kira. 

_ 'But he is gone now. That was Light without his memories and he is dead. Kira killed him and I am being ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. Why does Beyond put up with me?' _

As if in answer, Beyond drew L to him and wrapped him in his arms. "I love you, L. Losing Light will be difficult for you, but it will not be the end of the world. Your friendship with Light has hit you deeply because he  _ is _ , apart from me, the only peer friendship you've ever had. You're bound to mourn its loss"

"You're far more mature than I ever seem to give you credit for" L whispered, eyes filling with tears. "What am I, in your eyes?"

Beyond brushed his lips against L's. "You're my L, and you are perfect. Be strong, Baby. We are going to close this case and we are going to work together to solve other cases"

They curled up in bed but L couldn't sleep. He pulled Beyond on top of him, his mouth seeking out his in the darkness. 

"Love me, Beyond. I need you"

Beyond smiled into the kiss and wrapped L's around him, grinding his hardness down against L's groin. "Always" 

Beyond prepared him and eased inside, and L could only tremble and clutch onto him as he tried not to cry. The Kira case would be the only case to nearly break him. And Beyond was the reason he had survived it. 

L gently dug his nails into Beyond's back as he rocked into him, moving smooth and slow. Beyond wasn't fucking him, L realised. This was making love. 

"I love you, L. Say you'll come to the Seychelles with me once this is over"

L's eyes closed and he panted out yes, unsure if he was agreeing with Beyond or if he just wanted more of those delicious smooth thrusts inside of him. It didn't matter. He knew he wanted his Knight beside him for the rest of his days. 

"L! L, fuck, so good" Beyond hung his head, panting harshly as his thrusts increased in pace. "I'm gonna come!"

L opened his eyes and stared up at Beyond's passion twisted face. He reached up to cup Beyond's cheek and shuddered as he felt Beyond's passion spill into him. Despite being ensnared in the grips of his release, Beyond reached down to stroke his lover to his. L spasmed and clamped around his cock and Beyond moaned deeply at the liquid splash of L's passion against his stomach. 

Gasping for breath and clinging to one another, they recovered from their passion. L was crying but Beyond knew it was important to let him cry. Let him show his emotions. He held L until he cried himself to sleep but found no rest himself. 

_ 'Light Yagami. You bastard… I will  _ **_not_ ** _ let you win. You might have been his friend when you were without your memories but I was, and always will be, his first friend. I'll be with him long after you're dust!' _

Several floors below, Light stared at the iron bars in front of him. He felt cold and numb but his pride prevented him from crying. 

He wouldn't give any of them the satisfaction. 

_ 'It could have been so different, L. If only you had chosen me instead of him. I'll die, and it's going to haunt you for the rest of your life' _

Light opened his hand and smiled down at the thin, steel blade he'd smuggled down to the cells. L had miscalculated in not taking him to the cells himself. He should have known the others wouldn't have been as meticulous in their search as he would have been. Clearly L had been distracted by Beyond to let such a mistake happen. Obviously Light was going to capitalize on it. His death was the only thing he had left that he could control now. 

Light rolled the blade in the palm of his hand and concentrated on breathing deeply. He wouldn't die yet. He'd die when the sun rose. Kira didn't deserve to bow out of life in the darkness like a coward. 

He settled back on his cot and laughed softly, wetness on his face. It was a long time before he even registered he was crying. He felt ashamed of himself and wiped his tears away. He wouldn't spend his last night alive crying. He still had the opportunity to be the master of his own fate, and with that thought in mind, he pressed the blade to his forearm. This would be his final act of defiance. He would  _ not _ suffer the indignity of languishing inside a cell for the rest of his days.The cold steel felt icy against his skin and Light grit his teeth as he pulled it upwards. Red bloomed in rich, dark droplets and Light smiled at the irony of feeling shocked at the sight of his own blood when he'd spilled the blood of so many others. 

Beyond Birthday had killed people. He'd massacred them but he'd always done it in a  _ hands on _ sort of way. He'd been removed from the death he'd inflicted. Writing names down in a notebook removed one from the bloody act of murder. 

It seemed fitting, therefore, that he would finally kill  _ this _ way and that the person he would kill would be himself… 

Light smiled faintly as he watched the blood drip down his forearm and splatter against the floor. With each teasing, experimental cut, he grew braver and cut deeper, the image of L's dark eyes burning in his mind. He worked diligently through the night until the weak morning sunlight streamed in through his window. 

Pools of blood gathered around his feet as Light continued to open his veins. It had taken hours and he had suffered, but his pain was a release. The end was nearly in sight. 

_ 'Who am I, L? Who am I in your eyes? Things could have been so different for us… ' _

Light closed his eyes and fell to the floor with a soft sigh, his sluggish heart beating for the last time. He died with a smile on his face and one final thought in his head:  _ 'I've won…' _

Beyond tightened his hold on L, slumbering so peacefully, and pressed a kiss to his hair. It was over. Those ominous numbers above Light Yagami's head would have reached zero by now and he could sense Kira was dead. 

Now he would just have to help L deal with the fallout… 


	8. Find me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the wake of Light's Death, L's mental health deteriates drastically. Beyond has no choice but to teach him a tough lesson and makes a discovery about L that might explain why L struggles to express himself...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope I have approached the topic of Autism respectfully. It is not something I have a vast field of exptience in, however, Google was my friend and i do genuinely HC L as being on the spectrum (as do many DN fans)

Beyond sighed as he stared at the still-full cups of tea littering L's desk. A plate of cookies sat untouched and L was once again curled up in bed. 

"L…" he murmured, wondering if L was actually asleep or if he was staring into space. He received his answer when L squirmed deeper under the blankets. "Come on, Love, it's been six  _ months _ now. Light's gone. He isn't coming back"

Like a viper, L shot out of bed. "I  _ know _ that! God, you think I could forget?! He fucking killed himself, Beyond! All the fucking therapy and walks in the garden in the world can't help heal the hole he's carved into my heart! Selfish  _ bastard!" _

Beyond's eyes narrowed. He  _ hoped _ L was talking about Light there because he had been far from selfish himself. He had been wearing himself out covering cases and trying to help L back on his feet. L just wasn't prepared to help himself and it was getting under his skin now. He wasn't sure how much more of this  _ moping _ he could take. 

"Yes, I know you are hurt deeply, Love, but life goes on. The world has moved on already from Kira. Mourn your friend but remember that  _ he _ is the one who chose death. I know you, you would have tried to save him"

L blinked back tears at the accusation. Once again, Beyond's dart of truth had hit the mark perfectly. "I don't want to talk about this"

Beyond scoffed, anger bubbling up inside him. "Of course not. You never want to talk, do you, L? You just want to shut down and try and deny your feelings entirely. You will never get over his death if you refuse to accept it and grieve. Locking yourself away and being a moody little twat about it isn't helping anyone!"

L glared at Beyond and wished he could argue against what he'd said. He couldn't. He knew exactly what he was doing and he knew how dangerous it was. He and Beyond were drifting apart and he was the cause of it… 

He squeezed his eyes shut, tears trickling down his cheeks. Beyond wanted to reach out to him but he forced himself to stand firm. Watari hadn't gotten through to L. The therapist hadn't. He decided it was time for some tough love. 

"Do you love me, L?" He asked simply, red eyes burning into L's earnestly. 

"Yes! You know I do-"

"Well, start fucking  _ acting  _ like it!" Beyond turned on his heel and stalked out, his jaw locked with anger. 

********************

Matt, Mello and Near looked up from their laptops as Beyond stomped into HQ. A swift look exchanged between them spoke volumes. Beyond was  _ seething _ with anger. 

"I've had it up to here with him!" Beyond threw himself dramatically onto the sofa and Near sighed as he powered down his laptop. It appeared it was therapy time with Beyond.  _ Again _ . 

"He's grieving-" Near began, but was cut off by Beyond's scornful laugh. 

"I know! But it's forcing us apart. We haven't even had sex in… what, two months?"

Matt grimaced. "TMI, dude…"

Beyond managed a weak snigger, "Sorry" his face fell again and he sighed deeply. "I think I know what I am going to have to do to help him snap out of this. He needs a change of perspective and all I am doing is enabling him. He needs to be  _ forced _ to confront his grief"

Near nodded wisely, grey eyes fixed on Beyond. "You're going to leave him"

"Yes. I don't  _ want _ to but I think at this stage I  _ have _ to" 

Mello frowned, wishing there was something he could do to help. L had been unhinged for months and he agreed that, up until now, L's behavior had been enabled by everyone at Wammy's House. L didn't even bother going to therapy anymore and they, alongside Beyond, handled most of his cases. L was so absorbed in Light's loss he was blind to the fact his relationship with Beyond was shattering right in front of his eyes. Beyond leaving him would hopefully be the wake up call he so desperately needed. 

"I'm going to write a note for him. I want you three to give him the note two weeks after I've left. If you feel he needs more time you  _ must _ contact me, Alright?"

"Where are you going?" Mello asked, saddened at the news Beyond would be leaving soon. He loved having Beyond back at Wammy's. He'd taught him so much, like how to sneak into the kitchens at night and the best ways to piss Roger off… 

Beyond smiled sadly at his little protege. "I'm going to the Seychelles. I'm hoping I won't be out there too long but… I guess it depends on how soon L wakes up and realises what he's doing"

Matt and Mello exchanged a swift glance. Did that mean they had to handle the entirety of L's case load for at least a  _ month _ ?! It wasn't like they couldn't do it but they were only sixteen. They still had classes and other responsibilities too. 

"I'm going to speak to Watari and rope him in to assist you guys" Beyond reassured, sending Matt and Mello's unease. "Please. If I don't do this now I fear there is a very real chance of losing him altogether"

The three teenagers nodded their heads solemnly. Losing L to grief was something none of them were prepared to risk. They trusted Beyond and if he felt leaving was the best way for L to take stock and put things into perspective then so be it. 

"Alright" Near agreed. "Write that note and seal it. We will keep it safe"

"Thank you, Near" Beyond's shoulders sagged a little with relief. "I'll be in touch when I arrive"

The teens could only stare helplessly at Beyond's retreating back as he left the room as abruptly as he'd entered it. 

"Well, fuck" Mello summarized neatly. "What if L don't come around and we end up losing them both?"

"He  _ has _ to come around. Beyond said before Light's death L was getting better at talking and expressing himself. This is just a blip. Once L realises Beyond is gone and the damage he's causing he will realise what needs to change. He  _ loves _ Beyond. Losing him would hurt even more than losing that Yagami twat" Matt explained patiently, his tired green eyes lighting up at the sight of an energy drink he'd forgotten about. 

He had a funny feeling he'd be needing it… 

********************

When L next awoke, he felt a little calmer. He'd been dreaming about himself and Beyond as children again. This time he'd revisited the time when they'd ended up locked in the kitchen and feasted on sugar all night. Roger had been  _ furious _ with them but, in hindsight, it really was his fault for not securing the kitchen properly if two  _ six year olds _ could pick the lock. 

L rolled over with a small smile, wanting to tell Beyond what he had dreamed about, but the smile faded as he saw the other side of the bed was empty. He remembered their argument earlier and closed his eyes with a heavy sigh. He needed to get his act together, he knew that. He was pushing Beyond away and it wasn't fair. 

_ 'You never want to talk, do you, L? You just want to shut down and try and deny your feelings entirely. You will never get over his death if you refuse to accept it and grieve. Locking yourself away and being a moody little twat about it isn't helping anyone!' _

Beyond's words  _ stung _ and L curled up into a ball. Why was the truth always so cutting? Beyond was the most truthful person he knew. If you asked Beyond his opinion he'd give it to you whether you liked it or not. Beyond didn't believe in hiding behind lies and, given his history, that was one of his biggest strengths. Unless you knew him like L did, you'd automatically question if he was telling the truth and therefore he hid in plain sight in a way Light could never have hoped to emulate. Beyond was a killer. He still killed every few weeks but they never  _ talked _ about it. Beyond was smart enough to cover his tracks, but L realised with a heavy heart that he still didn't really  _ know _ Beyond as well as he wanted to. 

_ 'I'm so sorry, Beyond. I've been awful to you' _

For the first time in days, L climbed out of bed and went to shower. Once he was clean and dressed, he went downstairs to find Beyond and apologize to him. It was a fine spring day so perhaps they could get a coffee and talk in the gardens? 

Unfortunately for L, he had reached this realisation too late. Beyond had 'borrowed' Roger's Insignia and was already enroute to the airport… 

********************

Beyond felt numb as he sat on the plane and sipped his vodka. L was thousands of miles away and it  _ hurt _ . He knew L would react badly to being left alone, hell, even when Beyond had been shadowing him for years he knew L found comfort in it. They'd been inseparable since they were children and now Beyond would have to teach the one he loved a very painful lesson indeed. He could only hope it would be the wake up call L needed… 

Beyond sighed as he admired the twilight sky out of the plane window. What he wouldn't give for L to be with him now admiring such a gorgeous view.  _ 'Soon. He will find me soon, I know he will. I just have to be patient and give him the time and space he needs' _ Beyond reminded himself as he rolled the vodka around his tongue. Getting smashed seemed like a no brainer. It would make waking up without L tucked into him easier, anyway. 

Beyond closed his eyes and reflected on their time working the Kira case together. It had been awkward at first (obviously) but over the months they had reconnected. They'd even read the adventures of Merlin and Sir Lancelot together once again. They'd felt like children that magical night, tucked up against one another and losing themselves in a fantasy world. L would always be his wise mage and Beyond would always be his knight. Sadly, sometimes even Knights couldn't protect their mages from themselves. L  _ had _ to learn to open up and express his emotions. 

_ 'I'd love to be able to blame Roger and Watari but I can't. L has  _ **_always_ ** _ struggled with this and… Wait. Is it possible it's linked to a form of Autism?'  _ Beyond's eyes snapped open and he grabbed his laptop. He hacked into the medical files at Wammy's House and searched for L's. There were no indications he had ever been tested. He couldn't say he knew about Autism indefinitely but some of L's behaviors seemed to fit. L was extremely introverted, detested change, struggled to express his emotions, was a genius with an aptitude for music  _ and _ he stacked things all the time to help him think. 

_ 'Stimming behavior. I've seen this before! Why hasn't anyone made the connection until now? Why didn't  _ **_I_ ** _ see this earlier?' _ Excited, Beyond shot Watari an email explaining his findings. It wasn't long until he received a response from him. 

_ Beyond,  _

_ I have often thought along similar lines myself. However, the reason he has not been tested is because  _ **_he_ ** _ has refused several times. I believe he is afraid of what an official diagnosis would mean and how it would affect the way he is treated.  _

_ Now that you have made the same link I believe the only one L will listen to is  _ **_you_ ** _. He is currently frantic and trying to find you to apologize. It is heartbreaking but it is something that needs to happen for his own good.  _

_ Please keep in contact with us, Beyond, and hopefully at the end of this you and L will be stronger for it. _

_ QW.  _

********************

L was careening wildly through a variety of emotions. He'd cry, fall into a rage and then into bleak despondency. As the days passed and there was still no sign of Beyond, the despondency grew worse. 

Matt, Mello and Near debated giving L his letter early but decided against it. L  _ had _ to come out of this on his own. Beyond had said if L realised where he was and went after him then, and  _ only _ then, could they give L the letter. 

They were snowed under with cases but with Roger's and Watari's help they still found the time to visit their mentor. They arrived at L's room to find L curled up with a book in his hands, eyes misted with tears. Mello realised the books significance when he read the title: _ 'The adventures of Merlin and Sir Lancelot' _

"L…" Matt sighed, his dark green eyes sad as he took in what the World's Greatest Detective had become. "You know where he is, don't you?"

L nodded. "Yes. The Seychelle Islands"

"Then why are you still here?" Mello prompted as they closed the door behind them and sat down on L's bed like they used to when they were younger. 

"Because he  _ left _ me!" L spat, anger twisting his features. "Why would he do that if he cared about me?!"

When he didn't receive an answer, L looked to himself. He was being irrational. He  _ knew  _ the answer. 

_ 'It's because he wants me to understand I need help. I can't process emotion normally… especially without him by my side. I've been pushing him away and he wanted me to understand what I'm doing. I've been such an idiot… losing Light is one thing but Beyond? I  _ **_cannot_ ** _ lose him' _

"I need to go to him" L rasped as he flung back the covers and raced to his wardrobe to pack his bags. "I  _ get _ it now. Fuck! Why am I so stupid?!"

Even Mello kept his mouth shut as L packed his bags and muttered under his breath. It was Near who handed L his letter. 

"He told us to give this to you when you were ready to go to him"

L thanked the trio and blinked back tears as he read the address on the front of the envelope:

_ My dearest Lawli-Pop _

"Beyond" L chuckled tearfully, "You're such an idiot…'

The boys left L to his letter and made him promise to keep in touch. L assured them he would and asked them to inform Watari he would be leaving for the Seychelles on the next available flight. 

Once he was alone, L sat down amongst his bags and read the short but sweet note Beyond had left him. 

_ My darling L,  _

_ I am sorry for leaving you. I know I promised we would never be apart again but sometimes the most important lessons are the most painful.  _

_ You know where I am and I will be waiting for you. Do not let LY win, Love. You are stronger than this. Come to me and we will work through this together as a  _ **_team_ ** _.  _

_ Your knight,  _

_ Beyond.  _

L carefully folded the note and slipped it into his coat pocket. He wanted to read it over and over again but he couldn't. 

He had a flight to catch… 


	9. Perfect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> L and Beyond reunite, L comes to accept himself and asks Beyond a very important question...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yay! Final chapter and a happy ending for the jammy boi and his Lawli. They are perfect in MY eyes too 😍❤😍

The scent of tropical flowers and  _ warmth _ assaulted him as he stepped off the plane. L looked around, a little disorientated after the long flight. He decided he'd check into a hotel for a few days and conduct his search for Beyond. Knowing Beyond he'd make it into a sort of game and leave traces for him to follow. L doubted it would take very long to track him down. He  _ was _ the World's Greatest Detective after all. 

L booked himself into the first decent hotel he could find and set up his laptop. He immediately began to search for any murders and sighed as he found a match. Two young women had been found strangled on a nearby beach not two days ago.  _ 'Classic Beyond. At least this means I know you are close by' _

L ordered room service and settled down for a night of detective work. Despite the extra large ice cream sundae he felt bitter and  _ sad _ as he searched for Beyond. Would Beyond accept him back?  _ 'I know I wouldn't. I'd tell myself to fuck right off if I was in Beyond's place' _

Around midnight he decided to call it a night. He had purposefully chosen the main social hub for his stay and Beyond had always been attracted to busy areas with lots of people, unlike him who'd been repelled by such places. He was confident he'd find him soon. 

What he  _ wasn't  _ confident about was the reception he'd receive… 

********************

Beyond smiled to himself as he froze the airport security cameras. He would recognize that mop of hair anywhere. 

"L…" 

Beyond stroked the screen longingly. It had only been seven days but it had felt like a lifetime. He knew his most recent killing would attract L's attention so decided it was time to up sticks and relocate to the fancy beachside condos he'd been eyeing up. Of course, at the moment they were sat right on top of a crime scene and he knew his dear L wouldn't be able to resist checking it out. 

_ 'I hope he's come to terms with his grief. I hope he can actually talk to me, because I feel he isn't going to be too surprised when I tell him what I've found out' _

Beyond had already sourced a Dr who specialized in Autism who was happy to assess L, should he consent. The tricky part was actually getting L to agree to be tested. 

_ 'One step at a time. I've got to meet L and talk to him first'  _ Beyond reminded himself. It didn't take him long to pack up his belongings and check out of the hotel. 

It was a beautiful evening and Beyond enjoyed the stroll towards the beachside condos. The air smelt salty and he breathed in great lungfuls, imagining sitting with L on the dunes and making love under the stars. This place really was beautiful and soon, all going well, he'd have L back in his arms and then it would be  _ paradise.  _

Beyond stopped in his tracks as he saw a familiar figure walk straight towards him. He figured L had hacked the surrounding hotel lobbies cameras as he seemed to know exactly where he was. He was  _ waiting _ for him. Beyond smiled and walked quickly towards L, his heart skipping a beat as he took in those beloved features. 

"Ryuzaki!"

L startled at his codename but continued walking towards Beyond. 

"B…" L stopped and stared at him, his eyes wide and sad. "I'm so sorry…"

"Not here. Come on, I was hoping we'd bump into each other. I'm checking into one of them beach condos"

L sighed and nodded his head. He knew Beyond was right, it really wasn't wise to talk out in the open. He remained quiet as Beyond charmed the receptionist and booked them in for a two weeks stay. She even discounted their stay but L figured that was more to do with their appreciation of trade since there was a literal crime scene next door that was putting people off. 

Once they were safely inside their opulent suite, L went to the fridge and peeked inside. No sugar. Shame, he needed some. Beyond solved that problem by ordering in some cake and champagne from room service. 

A tense silence filled the air and Beyond wanted desperately to break it. He refused and bit his lip to maintain his silence. L  _ had _ to talk first! 

"B" L finally rasped, "I am so sorry for treating you like that. I… I just couldn't process the fact that Light was gone… and… " silent tears trailed down his cheeks, "I just can't seem to treat you right, can I? I'm a fuck up! I can't even express myself properly!"

Beyond's breath hitched and he crossed the room to pull L into his arms. At the feeling of those strong arms wrapping around him, L broke down and sobbed into Beyond's shoulders. "I'm sorry! I love you!"

"I know you do, Darling, and you are not a fuck up. I think you know the reason you struggle to express yourself. I think you've known it a long time. Baby, I want you to get the help you need. I want you to feel happier and to be able to express yourself. Our relationship depends on it because as much as I adore you it isn't fair on me to keep this going"

L sniffled and nuzzled into Beyond's shoulder. He knew it wasn't fair but he was  _ afraid.  _ He was  **L** . He wasn't supposed to feel like this. 

"You are  _ human _ , L, and you are absolutely supposed to feel like that" Beyond kissed the top of L's head. L couldn't even find it in himself to be mad at this display of power. Beyond, for all of his flaws, had been his sole supporter, confident and lifeline since his childhood. All he asked for in return was for L to open up to him.  _ 'I have to try. I have to stop running and face facts. I have to do it for him' _

"I… will see a Dr" L whispered into Beyond's neck. "I can't lose you"

_ 'Thank god this has worked' _ Beyond tightened his hold and squeezed L gently. "We'll get through this together, Baby. It's time for you to accept who you are and to stop being afraid. You will never be less than perfect in my eyes"

L made a strangled sob and clutched at Beyond. The scent of cloves, spice and the  _ strength _ of the other man filling his senses. 

Despite it being early, Beyond led L towards the bed and whispered for him to sleep. He could  _ feel _ L's fatigue and he knew things would be clearer for him after a good night's sleep. L cuddled close to him, scarcely believing this was real and they were together again. One of the last thoughts he had before he slipped under was that he needed to prove to Beyond how serious he was. 

_ 'I'm gonna marry him…' _

***********************

The next morning, L awoke to find piercing red eyes staring at him. Unable to stop himself, L ducked his head and muttered Beyond was being creepy. 

"Well, obviously" Beyond snickered. "How are you feeling?" He asked in a softer, more serious tone. "We need to talk, L. I didn't want to overload you last night but… I've found a specialist who is interested in meeting you. They can help you. Will you meet them today?"

L frowned but nodded his head, hazy memories of last sweeping over him. Yes, Beyond was worth that. Beyond was worth  _ everything.  _ "I do love you" L whispered, more to himself than Beyond, and nuzzled closer to him. 

Beyond's heart swelled at the words and he tightened his hold on L. "I love you too, L"

They lay together and listened to the gentle sound of waves lapping against the shore. Beyond closed his eyes in contentment and wondered if L was feeling as peaceful as he was. He felt vindicated. L had come all this way to find him again and he had finally snapped out of his all consuming grief for Light Yagami. There was hope for them, he could taste the hope in the air around them. 

After a leisurely breakfast and a frank heart to heart, Beyond held L's hand and led him to the private clinic he'd found. L tried to enjoy the tropical breeze and the beautiful surroundings but he couldn't help but feel nervous. 

_ 'I'm perfect in his eyes. I'm doing this for him' _ L reminded himself as Beyond pointed to the clinic ahead of them. 

They stepped into a cool, neutral reception area and Beyond worked his magic on the young receptionist, persuading her that no, even though they didn't have an appointment, it was urgent and Dr Norryval would wish to see the patient at once. She scampered off to to give the message and Beyond sat down next to L. 

"Baby, this could really help us. You wouldn't have to feel so shut in and alone… I don't want to feel like I've  _ pushed _ you to this. That was the whole point of me leaving. I wanted to give you the space you needed to work out things by yourself"

L fumbled for Beyond's hand. "I  _ am _ doing this because I want to but I'd be lying if I said my primary motivation wasn't to keep you and make you happy. I want us to work, Beyond. Losing you… it hurt. It cut deeper than losing Light ever could because  _ you _ are my everything"

Beyond smiled, a real, soft genuine smile and he squeezed L's hand back. "You are my everything too, L"

"Mr Ryuzaki?"

L gulped and rose to his feet. Beyond held his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze of encouragement. Feeling a heavy weight of  _ dread _ in his chest, L shuffled into the room… 

***********************

Later that evening, Beyond tried to charm and put L at ease as they dined in a local seafood restaurant, but he knew he was flatlining. 

L was quiet and pensive, his dark eyes lost as he stared out at the ocean. L had been diagnosed with high functioning Asperger's syndrome and while neither were surprised by the diagnosis, it was suddenly made  _ real _ now it was on paper. 

"Baby…" Beyond reached for L's hand. "It is nothing to be ashamed of. In some ways it shows what a genius you are. I told you before your test results and I will tell you again now: you are  _ perfect _ in my eyes"

L felt tears prick his eyes and he swallowed thickly. What he had ever done to deserve such loyalty and devotion? He mustered a smile and took a sip of wine. "And you are perfect in mine" L let his gaze linger on the 'crime scene' tape, "That and all"

"Awww, Babe!" Beyond's face lit up and L had to fight the urge not to roll his eyes. Beyond was just… Well, Beyond as far as things like  _ that _ went. 

The mood lifted, they tucked into succulent seafood and polished off a bottle of wine between them. The sun was sinking low in the horizon and Beyond had plans for L, plans he'd been thinking of ever since he'd first landed in this tropical paradise. Once they'd finished their food and settled the bill (L wisely decided it was best not to ask where Beyond had gotten the money from) Beyond suggested a 'romantic moonlight stroll'

L smirked at the implications as he clutched Beyond's hand in his. They chatted about simple things, and heavier issues like Light's death and L's diagnosis as they walked. It felt  _ good _ to talk so openly and by the time they'd arrived at the deserted sand dunes Beyond had scoped out, L felt happier than he had in  _ months _ . 

They sat under the stars and enjoyed the feeling of the cool night air whispering through their hair. Beyond shifted closer and gave L a none-too-subtle wink. L giggled and leaned in to kiss him. The kiss rapidly escalated until L found himself straddling Beyond and groaning as white hot sparks of pleasure zipped up and down his spine at the way Beyond was  _ sucking _ at his tongue. Beyond reached around to clutch and squeeze his ass, L felt himself  _ throb _ with desire. 

"Here?" He mumbled against Beyond's lips. 

"Mm. Under the stars" Beyond playfully nipped L's lower lip. "No one will spot us, Baby, I've already scoped out the viewing angles. Only way for someone to see us is if they come down the path we just used"

Despite his libido L was worried. "What if someone decides to come down here with a lover or something?"

"Then they can fuck off and find somewhere else to  _ come _ " Beyond replied smartly. L had to grin at that and leaned in for another hot, wet, kiss. They shed their clothes in between kissing and both shuddered as the cool air danced across the skin. 

"Don't worry" Beyond purred as he gently pushed L down onto the soft blanket, "I'll soon warm you up!"

L didn't doubt that for a moment. Beyond draped himself over him and languidly rubbed their erections together. L's head was spinning with pleasure and he tipped his head back with a gasp as the stars swam above him. Beyond chuckled and peppered little kisses to L's neck as he fumbled in his pants pocket for lube. 

_ 'Watari would have a coronary if he knew what I was doing'  _ L thought, hips bucking as Beyond toyed with his hard cock.  _ 'But I can't stop. I want him so badly' _

Beyond whispered reassurance and praise as he guided L onto his belly so he could prepare him. L clutched at the sand, feeling it yield between his fingers as his own body yielded and opened up to Beyond. The distant sound of a car horn made a thrill of excitement shot through him and he spread his legs wider, rocking into the fingers spearing inside.

"Oh, fuck, Beyond" L panted softly, half-afraid of making too much noise. "Please, I need you"

Beyond pressed a hot kiss to the nape of L's neck before removing his fingers and guiding L to lay on his back. L hooked his arms around Beyond's neck and watched with dark, lust-blown eyes as Beyond slicked himself up. 

"Ready?" Beyond whispered, wrapping L's legs around his waist. L answered by tightening his legs and pulling him closer. Beyond groaned as his cock brushed the entrance to L's body and he shakily guided himself into that scorching heat. 

L sank his nails into Beyond's back and tipped his head back in a silent scream. It felt so  _ right _ to feel Beyond sink inside of him again. The pleasure and the emotion brought tears to his eyes as Beyond rested inside him, his breath heavy as he struggled for control. 

"I love you. I love you, I'm sorry" L gasped, his walls crumbling as Beyond loomed over him. 

Beyond caught L's head in his hands and kissed him deeply. He didn't have to tell L he loved him because he could  _ feel _ it in the kiss. They kissed desperately as Beyond pumped into the willing body beneath him, their passion rising as they rocked together. 

L's breath hitched as he felt Beyond press deeper inside him and speed his movements. The stars blurred above him and he cried out Beyond's name as his pleasure crested. Beyond groaned and bit gently into L's shoulder as he followed him over the edge. They trembled and clung to each other as their passion spent and afterwards they remained locked in place, bodies shivering as the chilly air finally registered once again. Each pant, each movement filled their senses until all they could see and feel was one another. Everything made sense in that moment. 

Beyond pulled the blanket over them and nuzzled his nose against L's. "I meant what I said when I started the Kira case. I want to work beside you, love you… will you let me?"

Just like Beyond had done earlier, L answered with a kiss… 

((Epilogue, 2 months later)) 

L was nervous as he paced HQ. In his pocket he had a ring and he was determined today was the day he went down on one knee and proposed. Since their return from The Seychelles, he'd fully accepted his diagnosis and had actively worked with health care professionals to manage his Autism. 

Now he had one more thing to do to feel  _ comfortable,  _ finally, in his own skin. He needed Beyond to marry him and be his Knight by his side. 

"Heeeeey, Happy birthday to meee!" Beyond sang as he barged into HQ. 

Watari and the heirs looked at L expectantly. 

"What? Someone died or something?" Beyond looked at the serious faces and frowned. "No, seriously, what's going on? I thought I was part of team L and-"

_ 'It's now or never!' _ L dropped down to one knee and Beyond's eyes widened in realisation. 

"No  _ way _ " he breathed, a wide grin on his face as L flushed a vivid red. 

"Shut  _ up _ , Beyond" L grumbled before realizing he was ruining the moment. "I love you. I… want you to realise that you brought me back to life the second you walked into my life again. You promised me when we were children you'd always be by my side and… and I can't imagine my life without you in it. You've always been the one to chase me, follow me and to guide me but I want to be there for you as well. Beyond, will you marry me?"

Beyond blinked. Then giggled. 

L's eyes narrowed in annoyance. He'd worked damn hard on that speech and it took a lot of courage and practicing with Watari to get it  _ that _ good. 

"Lawli!" Beyond launched himself at L and L sagged in relief as Beyond peppered his face with ecstatic kisses. "Yes, I'll marry you! Best birthday gift  _ ever _ by the way!"

Matt, Mello and Near shared a pleased look and Watari discreetly snapped some photos of the happy couple as they shared a kiss. He knew the road ahead for them would be littered with potholes, it always was with them, but he also knew they'd make it through together. Beyond  _ was _ part of team L now, he was L's official partner, and he would soon be his husband as well. 

Together, and despite their flaws, they were perfect in his eyes… 

**Author's Note:**

> Leave some feedback, it makes me happier than Beyond Birthday in a bathtub full of jam 😍


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